Diner

It's only fitting [not for my pants] that since I blogged about healthy eating last night, I will blog about the complete opposite tonight. Diner food.

Living here temporarily at AVE Clifton, we're dangerously close to the Tick Tock Diner. A slender, pretty greeter/seater there [she must never eat the Disco Fries!] once told me, after I asked about famous people eating there, that Hillary Clinton had when visiting her mother. I don't know where her mother lives, or if they were en route somewhere, but that's close enough for me. I may one day butter my roll or cut my spinach pie with a knife Hillary used.

In fact, aside from ordering in, the Tick Tock, with its fun neon sign and clock that says EAT HEAVY, is the closest thing we can walk to if one of us doesn't have a car and is desperate for someone else to do the cooking. I think I've eaten there five times since we moved to Clifton March 21. Actually, five times seems like a lot. I was there with H. and Figgy; with just H.; with my friend Anne one night for cheesecake and a chat; with our relatives visiting from Florida; and with Sis, Don and H. after touring elder care facilities one Sunday. God knows, we needed some diner food after that. But in my defense, even though I am a Jersey girl and do appreciate a good cheeseburger and fries, I did have salad at least half the time. http://www.theticktockdiner.com/

Trip Down Diner Lane

My other favorite diners, in order by my age when I first slid into a booth there. 

• Matthew's Diner. I think it used to be called Matthew's Colonial Diner when my girlfriends and I were in Dumont High School. There wasn't much shaking in Dumont, and we couldn't afford any great shakes anyway, so a big night out may or may not have involved onion rings; a wedge of creamy-rich cheesecake; honeydew melon halves; Diet Coke with lemon; or chicken salad platters at this place in Bergenfield, and not necessarily in that order. That was a step up--before that, we had gone to Roy Rogers, no joke. I hadn't been to Matthew's for decades, but then over the last few years, Dad has suggested going there after some of his doctor's appointments. He likes the Swiss Burger Deluxe, and it is pretty darn good. I try to get something healthy, but then his fries always look so tempting--golden-crisp, not soggy and leaden, and just the right thick width for ketchup dipping--and he likes sharing them with me. But one time, I saw a neighbor there who I heard had unceremoniously dumped his wife, and I knew he knew that I knew, so it was an awkward exchange of glances, and I can always picture him there at that table in the corner, by the window facing Washington Avenue. Strangely, it's now called Matthew's Diner & Pancake House, but a. I can't find a website for it and b. don't bother going for the pancakes.
• Vague diner by the shore. I don't remember the name, but I do remember the kindness. I was going down to the Jersey Shore for a few days with Moey's family one summer Saturday morning, and they had a tradition, I think, of stopping at a diner along the way. I think someone in the family talked about steak and eggs? All I remember is that I felt really lucky to be treated to breakfast there with Moey and her grandfather [Pop, who lived a full life, driving happily until age 100] and other family members. Moey's family taught and continues to teach me so much about generosity and grace.
• Dine-O-Mat. When I worked at Seventeen Magazine in my twenties, writing promotional copy and advertorials for Maybelline and Tampax, I wasn't too far from this fifties-style place, which was uptown on Third Avenue near 57th Street in NYC. I remember singing waiters and waitresses, and big burger platters. I definitely dragged people there--people including H. and Sis, for sure.
• Claremont Diner. This was so close to the Tick Tock on Route 3 West that I always wondered aloud to H. or Moey about how it would ever survive. It was run by a Greek family. It did close years ago, sadly. The big buckets of pickles were the best, crunchy and half-sour, and the generous house salad in a shallow etched glass dish--which came with the entrees--was delicious. The tuna melt on rye with Cheddar was even better. When I was pregnant with Figgy, that was an occasional favorite of mine. And once, when my old friend Fritch and her love Bob were visiting, we went to the Claremont with them. H. and I always remember that Bob ordered the big Fisherman's Platter. Whenever we go to a diner and see a Fisherman's Platter on the menu, we think with a smile about Bob, even though he and Fritch parted ways. 
• Moody's Diner. This is an icon on Route 1 in Waldoboro, Maine. It's known for its pies and more. I went with H. and tried the Grapenut Custard, which is a Maine thing. [I also had that at a little diner near Kennebunkport. It somehow conjures up images of George and Barbara Bush, since the Bush compound is in Kennebunkport, but it's well worth sampling.] My brother-in-law, John, gave me the Moody's cookbook one Christmas. http://www.moodysdiner.com/
• The Cozy End. Oh, the cozy Cozy End, on Valley Road in Upper Montclair, right across from Lukoil and Kings. I've been there many times in the 19 years I've lived in town--with my older neighbor, Francie; and with Figgy and assorted friends, from L. to C. The decor is plain and basic but the chicken salad & bacon club sandwich on white toast hits the spot. On Friday mornings during the school year, you can often find groups of attractive, fit PTA moms laughing and chatting over breakfast. [I'm not among them--if I'm there, it's because I popped in, on a rare whim, for sausage on an English muffin to go.] True, the pickles could be better. I generally made Fig and pals walk there with me--it's about 20 minutes. I once took several girls from our Girl Scout troop, and that's the Saturday when they sat at the big round table in the back [near the pie case, but skip the pies, they're not special] and started waxing poetic about the pleasures of dunking fries into chocolate shakes. Later, Figgy read in Seventeen that some young celeb also loves that combo, and she felt so validated. She taped the page up near her frilly pink canopy bed. Please note: She no longer has a frilly pink canopy. In eighth grade, in her Twilight phase, she asked if she could dye it black with a Rit kit. It came out a washed-out gray. http://www.cozyend.com/

Well, speaking of bed, I better go there now, visions of cheeseburgers in my head. And not a single fry in the house [except some frozen sweet potato fries]. But see how good I am? I could walk right up to the Tick Tock right now--it's open 24 hours--but I'm not going to.

No sirree bob. Fries at this hour? Fries with gravy? Fries with melted cheese? A rich, creamy chocolate milkshake to slurp with a straw? Absolute farthest things from my mind.

Would also love to hear about your favorite dives, um, I mean diners.

Above: A still from the movie Diner, 1982, starring Kevin Bacon [good name for diner role] and others.