Monster

How I see myself right now.

I was a monster this morning and of course am feeling remorse, regret, self-doubt, shame and sadness over it.  I was furious at everyone in my house and let it be known. I said some very ugly things.

I am slowly realizing that sitting with ugly feelings, though--as with sunny, light, proud, or anxious ones--is something that must be done. Cannot cloak them in chocolate and whipped cream. The best way out is always through--that's a saying I've heard.

On another note, have been making some weight-loss progress and I want to document changes I've made/things I've been doing right--just so I don't forget.

I hope your day is going well.

Positive changes:

• Walk dog a couple/few times a day.
• Eat a high-protein breakfast and add vegs when possible. Dannon coffee yogurt with a handful of sea salt roasted almonds is filling and yum. So is a scrambled egg with spinach, onion and a little feta, with a piece of whole-grain toast.
• Whole wheat breads over white whenever possible.
• Don't bring packages of cookies or cakes or candy into the house. If really want chocolate, go buy a single serving...Starbucks chocolate cake pop or dark chocolate graham crackers.
• Do not bring evil potato chips in the house. Again, if really want, get single serving bag.
• OK to bake for someone, for a big group of teens or for a party/company.
• Keep refilling cup of ice water.
• Don't watch TV at night too often. Not unless you already made the homemade popcorn or have a cold orange ready to go, b/c otherwise you will crave crap.
• Skip the fattening, sweet coffee drinks. If must get coffee to get through day--it seems like a chic accessory--stick to iced coffee with Splenda and half and half.
• Play music while working. Pop CD into laptop. Makes you content, less bored and less likely to get restless and root around cabinets for a snack.
• Wear fitted clothes, not elastic waists--which are too forgiving. If the waist is snug, you are more conscious of overeating. And plus you feel more polished and put together, like someone who takes pride in how she looks.
• Keep going to boot camp!!!!! Add bike rides to church or store when possible.
• Plan meals and snacks. Have food in the house for breakfast, lunch and dinner, even if just one day at a time. Don't play the wild card.

TCOY

Ummmm...big fat nothing? But it is only 2:59 P.M. Oh wait a minute, salon blowout and coffee yogurt with almonds for breakfast.