Photo courtesy of Joshua Reddekopp via Unsplash.
“A dysfunctional family is any family with more than one person in it.”
― Mary Karr, The Liars' Club
Gosh, I love that quote. And whenever things get rough, and I remember to remember that quote, it brings comfort and perspective.
Because despite the
*quiet beauty (glowing candles, a Parisian one from Sis and pure beeswax pinecones from Meggy in Vermont)
*lasting faith (Christmas Mass in the little country church, the tiny nativity scenes I’ve had since girlhood, which I squirreled up to Maine in my Christmas stocking)
*joy (playing “Reindeer Games” and Yankee Swap with so much laughter and love)
*family (sharing meals, walks, memories)
and
*light (Figgy doing my makeup on Christmas Day, a red lip, a shadowed eye)
the ugly head of dysfunction still rises.
I won’t go into specifics in this public space, just....between a teenager in love and on FaceTime many hours of the day, even if the boy is very nice, many hours in the car and small Airbnb apartment, finally asking her to please maybe go in the bathroom with her phone for a while and close the door? and a beautiful young woman returns home from the Florida coast to a complicated past and present, then drives in a car with us 450 miles to our family in Maine...
It’s not just youth, laughter, vulnerability, humor, talent, brains, rap songs, love for us (spilling over, or reluctant), sarcasm and wrapped gifts these young women bring.....it’s some troubles, too. For both. So if for a moment I got lulled by Yuletide hymns at church and little girls in velvet dresses, bringing back memories of my Figgy in that same country church, it’s these realities that bring me back, in a jarring way.
Life is beautiful, and life is hard.
On the soft side, two links to tablescape stories I enjoyed writing. Have a good day. May we all tread lightly and keep our eyes open.
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Thanks for the links! I do try to have bits of nature on the mantel or in a vase, but the picture of the table piled high around the plates with twigs and lichen made me laugh - too much!
ReplyDeleteThe swings of loneliness, terror at being unpopular, then the swings of suffocating closeness and obsession. Again, exhausting. And living on your own in a new state is hard too, so bet No 1 also had expectations of some family Attention. I know you are thrilled to be with her. But it is a lot. Hang in there, Alice!
C’est moi.
ReplyDeleteLiz
Life is beautiful and life is hard. Too true.
ReplyDeleteBut.. quiet beauty, lasting faith, joy, family, and light! I love how you can be present with them in the midst of all the hard stuff.
—Nan
Thank you, dear Liz and Nan.
ReplyDeleteLife is beautiful, and life is hard.
ReplyDeleteI agree!