Sunday-Night Tired

The color of the year, Peach Fuzz, makes me think of Mrs. C's pretty kitchen in Dumont. When I saw peach taper candles at Van Hook, I scooped up a pair.

Full day....instead of turning off my alarm at 7:45 a.m. and going back to sleep, I got up and went to 9 a.m. support group. Good people there, and it meets at a conference room in a nicely renovated local hospital.

I'm not too often in that part of town. I walked partway home so I could stop at nearbly Van Hook Cheese + Grocery (especially for pretty taper candles in peach* and yellow, reasonably priced) and smooth 100 percent dark chocolate that somehow carries it off without any sugar. Dan found it too bitter but I like the midnight dark Cacao Sampaka bar from Barcelona. Luxury priced at $10 for 2.64 oz. They make coffee and cappuccino chocolate "tablets," too. Also grabbed a half-gallon of whole milk from a farm, wedge of Brie for Dan/Punch/me, nice round wheat crackers.

The Jones Road (Bobbi Brown makeup) shop is right around the corner, so I also stopped there because my brow pencil is down to a stump and I wanted to try a new tinted lip balm.

Later, Dan and I gardened. He planted bulbs and I raked the lawn and around the shrubs and potted pretty pink-and-white-striped dahlias. In that regard, we are a good team. I made spaghetti squash with turkey bolognese sauce. I think there are leftovers for Punch's lunch tomorrow. 

Good night.

*Pantone's Color of the Year for 2024 is Peach Fuzz. I thought of that when I plucked a pair of peach tapers off the rack at Van Hook.

Goodbye, Love: Chocolate Story

Sorry to double-dip, posting a story on Medium AND here, but it is relevant.

ADDICTION RECOVERY STORY #29, HYDRANGEA: THE CASE OF THE CANDY QUEEN

LINK BELOW

 https://alicegarbarinihurley.medium.com/addiction-recovery-story-29-hydrangea-the-case-of-the-candy-queen-1d6e74f46ca

Good night.

Sorry Not Sorry, Santa--No Cookies for You

1. A picture of me in a dress by Karina Dresses that I came across maybe seven? years ago in Thread, a boutique that used to be right next to Bluestone Coffee Co. on Watchung Avenue in Montclair. That's Punch/Skippy sitting nearby. Then, over Labor Day Weekend 2019, Dan, Punch and I tried to go away overnight at the last minute with our friends A and M and their daughter, but the Airbnb fell through and we ended up walking around Kingston, NY, where my friend A saw the Karina Dress shop, with its motto: "The original easy dress."  However, the shop was closed. I looked it up online later.
2. A link to my latest Medium story, which includes a reference to Karina Dresses and a new teal velvet one.

https://alicegarbarinihurley.medium.com/sorry-santa-no-cookies-for-you-9330a4a10b31

Good Stuff

Above, a small but divine tin of designer hot chocolate for the family that my personal shopper delivered--SHOPPING LINK. The $16 price on Sarabeth's website is steeper than the $14.29 + tax Instacart price at Kings.

Definitely still speed bumps in the road--but whose life doesn't have bumps, right?

Positive notes today: 

1. Cautiously happy about a new writing client that seems right up my alley. #gratititude
2. Placed Instacart order and got ingredients for Creamy Tomato Bisque from Ina's new Modern Comfort Food. I won't lie, a big pot of soup calls for 2 cups of cream....also, saffron threads, but the store was out of them. Will do without. Punch said she will make dinner Wednesdays, so I'm hopeful, especially since she was in the mood for tomato soup yesterday.
3. In that delivery, I also made sure to get basic foods I count on: frozen cinnamon-raisin Ezekiel English muffins; jumbo Fage 2 percent Greek yogurt; canned organic pumpkin; cottage cheese; and a good whole-grain Bread Alone loaf from the Catskills. Plus: 3 cardboard half-gallons of organic whole milk (Ina's soup calls for a full quart, and Dan and I use A LOT of milk in coffee....). I'm trying to not buy single-use plastic, including gallon milk jugs, when possible.
4. One of Punchy's middle school teachers had a monthly "Among Us" night, where he and the kids play that wildly popular online game. I can't explain it, so let WIKIPEDIA: check this LINK. I loved overhearing P interacting with her school friends (and they can see each other on Zoom if they use two devices, I guess). Her friend, whose house she pods at (with his sister), came over to play, too. I made them hot chocolate and offered mini marshmallows and squirt whipped cream (Cool Whip for P.). It turns out these things were tempting for me--no surprise--but in the end, I stopped myself and walked away. Sarabeth's Hot Chocolate is the very best, and I got that in my Kings Instacart order, too.
5. Planning some nice walks this week.
6. Standing by through P's Algebra class seems to be helping us both. We are both taking notes and solving (or trying to solve) equations in live time. She has been teaching me things, such as how to define an "open equation."
7. Short walk down the hill and up again.
8. My friend served me a delicious kale salad with tahini-lemon dressing. Yum.
9. I ordered a dress I have been eyeing on Karina Dresses, which is based in Kingston, New York, Kim. They have beautiful styles; I had a $10 reward. The three dresses I have stand up well to machine washing, etc and are very comfortable and pretty.
10. Ordered Hanukkah foods with recipes from a local organic co-op for this week. P wants to be Jewish, and I like making some Jewish foods. Hoping Dan makes his very good latkes, because the produce box include Yukon Gold potatoes. Ordered chocolate gelt for the three kids in the pod, too. Also vegan stocking-stuffer treat for Figgy and something for Dan. And regional farm-sourced items like jam; sour cream; applesauce.
11. Asked my Google speaker to play Italian holiday music and she complied. Fun.

I have to sleep. My turn to get P up by 7. Kim, Lin, Nan, Liz, thanks for the nice notes--I can't comment on this laptop right now, tho I tried.

Good night.

The Big Chocolate Reveal

https://link.medium.com/o95VMdndoab

I WAS A LUXURY CHOCOLATE SECRET SHOPPER

(In case you’re hitting the paywall on Medium.com and don’t want to subscribe for $5 monthly, I will try to paste the text of my story here tomorrow.)

With special thanks to Sis, Celia and Kim M, who accompanied me on some of my clandestine coups. 

Bridging the Gap with Groceries--and 2 Luxuries

Images above: Roger and Julia, the husband and wife who own Vesta Chocolate, and the shop itself. They roast their own beans, sourced from the Dominican Republic.

On Saturday, October 3, I spent $255 at Kings, then $35 at 212 Salon & Day Spa (all careful Covid protocols in place) to get my hair blown out by Christina, plus $10 in tips for shampoo lady and stylist. To cap it off, a rare treat these days--the perfect small hot mocha, about 8 ounces, from Vesta Chocolate. I'm steering clear of chocolate, but hope that might be okay once a weekend. It is a carefully crafted treat; the mochas from Starbucks and other places pale in comparison. Cost: about $6.30.

The.perfect.mocha. Figgy also likes it made with oat milk.

I want to list the groceries, since the bill was over $250. As I wrote the other day, we are between payments here. Dan and I made a list of what we needed in one grocery trip to bridge the gap. For example: We have pizza dough in the freezer, and red sauce in jars, but needed mozzarella, both regular and vegan shreds, for a weeknight dinner. Some things here were wanted, not needed. I put those in pink. I also forgot to get one thing--tofu. I think I did pretty well. I got what we needed for a number of meals--raviol, quesadillas, pizza, steak, soup, roasted vegs. I'm curious--how does this look to you, what I got for the money?

1. Shredded mozzarella, BOGO.
2. Shredded mozzarella (second pack free).
3. Vegan mozzarella-style shreds.
4. First jar of artichoke hearts.
5. Second jar of artichoke hearts.
6. Piece of Portherhouse steak, on sale, to stretch through 3 meals for one person.
7. First bag of spinach-ricotta ravioli.
8. Second bag of spinach-ricotta ravioli.
9. Presliced deli provolone.
10. Presliced deli ham.
11. Bread Alone peasant bread, one loaf.
12. Vermont wheat bread, one loaf.
13. Pint organic half and half.
14. Pint organic heavy cream to whip for berry table Sunday. (I usually don't spring for Horizon brand, in the red carton. It was $6.79!! But I have to say it was delicious, whipped to pretty peaks without a pinch of sugar or drop of vanilla. Honestly, it tasted like a sweet treat from the farm and had the palest hint of meadow yellow.)
15. Large Cabot Greek yogurt.
16. Large Friendship cottage cheese.
17. Bag of Lil Snappers Honeycrisp "kid-size" apples, on sale.
18. First bag fresh Brussels sprouts.
19. Second bag fresh Brussels sprouts.
20. Third bag fresh Brussels sprouts.
21. Frozen Ezekiel English muffins.
22. Pound Land O'Lakes butter.
23. EVOO cooking spray.
24. Pack fresh mushrooms
25. Second pack fresh mushrooms.
26. Third pack fresh mushrooms.
27. Berry jam, BOGO.
28. Second berry jam, free.
29. Toothpaste.
30. Pack of 1-oz, 100-calorie Cape Cod potato chip snack bags.
31. Bananas.
32. First can Amy's organic soup.
33. Second can Amy's organic soup.
34. Third can Amy's organic soup.
35. Fourth can Amy's organic soup.
36. Kings hazelnut coffee, deep sale.
37. Huge can Chock full o'Nuts coffee, $2 off.
38. Box of Capri Sun juice pouches.
39. Half-gallon fresh apple cider.
40. Pack of Gotham lettuce leaves for sandwiches.
41. Wet dog food x5.
42. Pack of whole-wheat tortillas.
43. Dozen cage-free eggs.

Have a good day. 

Spendthrift, Clotheshorse, Hostess, Foodie, Helper, Meal Maker, Mother, House Cleaner, Gardener--and Dream Weaver

A trusted friend pointed out to me that if I continued to blog here daily about what I ate, I would not be able to rein it in. Because it was colorful, detailed, entertaining, even--but it was not helping me clean up my act. So I now generally just list good eating steps in my TCOY...fruits or vegs I ate, healthy recipes I made.

Yet I'm hesitant to stop listing my spending here. It, too, is detailed and maybe colorful, but the numbers add up to a flat, concrete, black-and-white sum, a figure to average by day and compare month to month. The moving parts are FACTS, DATA. So for now, what I started on January 3, 2019 [after spending a lot in December 2018] is ongoing. Here is that first $ post.

Here is my spend, my first monthly tally, from February 2019, and it is high: https://insearchoftruthandbeauty.blogspot.com/2019/03/staring-down-spend_4.html

Anyway, June is almost over. Let me catch up on this month. Stores in town are reopening, and I'm reopening my wallet to support them. Even my beauty salon is finally open, with very careful safety protocols in place.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET, TUESDAY, 6/23 THROUGH MONDAY, 6/29

• Slice of pizza and diet Snapple and tip, $7.
• SLA Thai, my brother-in-law Mike stopped by on his drive back to Maine and we treated for Thai pickup. Dinner, appetizers and Thai iced teas for 4 plus big tip, $122.
• 212 Salon, blowout plus tips, $47.
• 212 Salon, pedicure, the first since December, with tip, $45.
• Lunch in town with Fig and Punch at bagel shop, with beverages and big tip, $40.
• Sunday, The General Store, "I choose happy" calendar pad for Punch, plus drink for her, $16.
• Sunday, Falafel Hut lunch to bring Figgy at work, plus 2 diet Snapples and tip, $24.58. [Fig won't always live here; she has her eye on grad school. She had a serious eating disorder. So when I can, I like to drop off lunch or snack.]
• Vesta Chocolate, jar of homemade hazelnut spread [healthier than Nutella, and less sugar] plus treats for Punch and tip, about $36.
• Vesta Chocolate, $10 for Punch treats.
• Java Love, drinks/snacks for me, my friend Sue and Punch, $19.57.
• Moss & More, beautiful flower pot with saucer, reusable floral tote bag, Common Good refillable cleaning spray and dish soap, $88.71.
• Kings in person, $98. Included pink rose to plant in flower pot; 2 half-gallons milk; coffee creamer; chicken; 2 packs sliced cheese; 1 lb. sweet cherries; good rye bread; Enlightened frozen bars; flan cups for Punch; firecracker popper things for her; $17 donation bag of groceries for Montclair Food Pantry; and fancy coffee from Anaheim, CA.
• Kings in person, laundry detergent; fresh broccoli; head of lettuce; dog food x2; 88 percent dark chocolate bar; and more, $38.78.
• Sparo's Deli sandwich with tip, $15.25.
• Williams-Sonoma, two good jarred sauces on deep sale, $13.98.
• Barbara Eclectic, 2 more adult masks and one cute flamingo-patterned youth mask, $29.86. They are made from swimsuit material and breathable--just rinse out with soap and water and they air-dry quickly.
• New Hermès refillable lipstick, I love the mod color and case, with free overnight shipping. The regular shades are $67 but the limited edition ones are $72.  Plus tax, $76.77.
• Uber to hair salon in town Saturday [girls caught a ride with me] plus tip, $13.28.
• Round trip Uber to town Friday morning to pick Punch up when her bike tire popped, plus tip, $12.80. 
• CVS, 2 bags Dr. Teal's lavender Epsom salts, $13.93.
• Nordstrom, Wacoal bra in beautiful lace pattern, used $10 Nordstrom reward note so $28 with free shipping.
• Amazon, stress/fidget toys, pens, journals for Punch to use as she works through this ongoing therapy program, with $8 shipping, $76.
• Kings on bike just now, 1/2 gallon 2 percent milk; bunch of organic bananas; and marshmallows, graham crackers and a milk chocolate bar for s'mores [for others, not me], $19.67.

Total spend for 7 days: $892.08.

Ongoing monthly spend as of June 29: $3,259.22.

Avg daily spend: $112.39.

$$$: Keeping Track/Facing the Music

Today alone I spent a lot [$100 plus $10 tip for grooming Sug, 16, who has many cysts]--but I'm not listing that here, since it was necessary, not frivolous. She was liking a walking dust mop, couldn't see with the hair in her eyes. Likewise, not listing my steep $75 dr/specialist co-pay under our marketplace health insurance. Ubers and groceries are also essential, but still, I'm listing them--because they can go overboard.

TCOY

1. I clipped forsythia, pulled weeds and pruned saplings in back garden.
2. Punch and I Ubered Sug to the Grooming Gallery [our car died] and then took long walk back into town. Exercise.
3. Determined to work on essay this evening, even if only two sentences.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET FROM SUNDAY, JUNE 14 TO WEDNESDAY, JUNE 17

• Vesta Chocolate, one ice-cold Magical Butterfly Lemonade [changes color, really cool] and one sea-salt chocolate chip cookie for Punch plus small bar 100 percent pure cacao [no sugar] chocolate for me, with $1.25 tip, $19.
• Sandwich Theory, iced coffee for me, muffin for Punch and later, Diet Snapple for me, with tip, $8.
• Sandwich Theory Tuesday, sandwich and iced coffee, $11.85.
• Soho Pizza on Valley Road, slice of chicken parmesan pizza each for Punch and me, plus bottle of water, $11.50.
• Barbara Eclectic, black skirt on sale and 4 face masks, one to give a friend and 3 for family, $87.45.
• Williams-Sonoma, open again, masks required, maximum 16 people in store, 2 bowls, 1 small plate, Maldon Sea Salt Flakes, $35.11.
• Kings, in person, ingredients for basic vegetable soup from the Judith Jones book--but I made enough for 4, not one. Huge bunch Swiss chard, veg bouillon cubes, Vidalia onion, 2 yellow potatoes, plus fruit juice, garlic, sushi + a seaweed salad for Punch, large can shelled walnuts, Italian wedding soup, loaf of local semolina bread, 2 reusable bags [I was walking home], 1/2 lb. salted Vermont butter, Vermont whole-wheat English muffins, 4 large bananas, $69.82.
• Montclair Stationery, box of 50 business envelopes, get well card, photo album, $20.58.
• Uber cancelled ride, I think because driver didn't want to take the dog, $5.
• Uber from home to groomer with $3 tip, $11.90.
• Uber back to groomer from town with $3 tip, $10.88.
• Uber home from groomer with $3 tip, $12.04. I don't usually tip that high but it is the pandemic...and also, drivers took Sugar.
• Uber to dr appt Tuesday plus $3 tip, $13.67.
• CVS, 2 bottles bubble bath, $21.
• Kings, tender asparagus and a 3-oz bar 88 percent cacao dark chocolate, $8.60.
• Instacart, Kings, smoked whitefish, shaving gel, body wash/bubble bath and something else, $46.31.
• Rented the documentary "Obit," so good, $3.99.

total 4-day spend: $396.70.

ongoing monthly spend as of June 17:  $1,947.

avg daily spend: $114.53. As of now, my monthly spend is higher than what it was in all of March, when coronavirus took hold--and it is only June 17. I hope I can rein it in. I have been doing a lot of grocery and other shopping.

Keep an eye on/compare to previous months:

April 2020: Total monthly spend: $2,143.19.
Avg daily spend: $71.44.

March 2020--the effect of coronavirus quarantine and not working in NYC for now

Total monthly spend as of March 31: $1,916.15.

Avg daily spend: $61.81.

February 2020

Total monthly spend as of Feb. 29: $2,480.34.
Avg daily spend: $85.53.

TOTAL SPEND FOR MAY 2019: $2,348.24.

MAY AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $75.75. 

TOTAL SPEND FOR APRIL 2019: $3,634.28.

APRIL AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $121.14.

Spending Spree--and Yet, the Sadness Persists [of Course It Does]

The book is appropriately small, about
6.5 x 8.5 inches. Judith Jones is a magical name in the publishing world.
[See below.] Her beef stew sounds like it
will nicely feed me and Punch, the only
meat eaters in the house--and Sug will surely beg for a nibble.

Things have been rocky with raising Punch. And when that happens, I tend to overspend, instead of take stock of our strengths and the blessings we have, the wind and the godspeed that can power us through rough seas. Some of this spending was essential [groceries for meals, new bike lock, new air pump, both long overdue] but some was just to cheer myself up.

• Amazon, Salt on a Robin's Tail paperback by my friend Celia's friend Andrea Kott. It's a memoir and sounds really good.   
  • Salt on a Robin’s Tail: An Unlikely Jewish Journey Through Childhood, Forgiveness and Hope, is a true story of love and loss, struggle and survival, despair and hope. It shatters stereotypes, and inspires reconciliation with painful pasts. Salt On a Robin’s Tail | Andrea Kott andreakott.org/salt-on-a-robins-tail/  With shipping and tax, $21.31.
• Amazon, SKINNY DIPPED ALMONDS SuperDark + Sea Salt Chocolate Covered Almonds, 0.46 Ounce Mini Bags, 24 Count, free shipping, $24.99 plus tax. I read about these via Nutritionist Sam, the nutrition/diet/fitness editor at Good Housekeeping who was handpicked by my friend--the great Delia Hammock--when she retired. Sam has really good advice. Our paths at work crossed briefly.
• Greenwich Avenue parking meter with Sis, 25 cents.
• Out of the Box fashion store on Greenwich Avenue, feminine floral skirt marked down from $168 to $45, with tax, $47.86.
• Iced coffees and biscotti for Sis and me, plus tip, $15.59.
• Kings, Instacart doorstep delivery today, w service fee and tip: 2 half-gallons organic reduced-fat milk; good rye bread; 1 pound good deli turkey; Acme smoked whitefish spread; brioche buns, which Punch loves; organic strawberries; 6 large bananas; Food for Life sprouted almond cereal; and 2 frozen Phillips crab cakes for Dan and Punch dinner, $77.58. 
• Starbucks, Montclair, grande decaf iced coffee plus big $3 tip since first Starbucks drink since March, $6.47.
• Ditto, enticement, curbside pickup to get Punch up and out early yesterday for 2 hours at doctor's office for physical, bloodwork etc, screening for behavioral program. She got 2 egg/bacon/Gouda breakfast sandwiches and one very tall iced drink, $14.20.
• Bank fees, $4.25.
• Watchung Booksellers, back-door pickup in Montclair, $28.75. The book is The Pleasures of Cooking for One by Judith Jones. It is an endearing book that I saw in the bookshop on my day trip to Southampton last summer but didn't have the money to buy it. Judith Jones (née Bailey; March 10, 1924 – August 2, 2017)^[1] was an American writer and editor, best known for having rescued The Diary of Anne Frank from the reject pile.^[2] Jones also championed Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking.^[3][4] She retired as senior editor and vice president at Alfred A. Knopf in 2011.^[5] Jones was also a cookbook author.....  I could have gotten the book much cheaper online, but when I can, I like to support my independent bookstore. It is a keepsake book and I will remember the special place where I first saw it last summer and the place I got it now.
• Figgy--I felt like giving to this hardworking college-loan holder, $20.
• Vesta Chocolate,  bag of pure cacao nibs [no sugar], 2 iced coffee drinks, 1 cacao sea salt brownie, $26 plus $3 cash tip because many small businesses are not making it and we love Vesta, $29. [We found out Joyist is closing permanently. Sad.]
• Ditto, gift bag of 3 cacao sea salt brownies for Punchy's friend's zoom bday, 1 sea salt chocolate chip cookie each for Elaine and Punch, rounded up to next dollar, $31.
• Local Jackie's Grillette, lamb and feta sandwich to last two meals, iced tea, iced coffee, 1/2 gallon organic milk, head of cauliflower, one orange pepper, one loaf local Nicolo's Italian bread, with generous tip, $37.48.
• Kings, large cart of groceries in person Sunday night: pork chops, fresh turkey burgers, vegan veggie burgers, regular veggie burgers, butter, tortilla chips, pita chips, large fresh baby spinach, bread, cantaloupe, Jarlsberg Lite slices, 3 oz. 88 percent dark chocolate bar, bag of potting soil, citronella candle, dog treats, Van's waffles, diet orange soda, large jar wheat germ, 2 half-gallons organic 2 percent milk, cashews, dried figs, and many other items, $213.
• Flowering garden plants [pink and white impatiens, red and white verbena, snapdragons, more] chosen with Punch, She planted a few today. $41.90. The pure whites made me think of the white clothing worn at George Floyd's funeral.
• Artigiano Jewel Box, the wonderful artisan treasure trove designed by Andrea Schettino in my hometown of Dumont. I was feeling especially hopeless and sad today about charting P’s path and how to help her, and I ordered this watermelon tourmaline pendant. Remember what I heard: Pink lifts the spirits of the wearer and those who see her or him. Here is the LINK. I love the handcrafted sterling silver setting. With shipping, $141.03.
• The Bail Project. Our great neighbors Liliana and Michael bought Black Lives Matter lawn signs and handed them out to those who want them, with a suggestion of places where to donate. $25.87.
• Montclair Bikery, sturdy new lock and impressive bike pump, $72.44.
• The Closer, season 4 on Netflix, $29.99.

total spend Friday, June 5 to Thursday, June 11:  $889.28.

ongoing monthly spend as of June 11:  $1,373.59.

avg daily spend: $124.87. As of now, this is more than twice as much as my avg. daily spend in March, when coronavirus took hold. I hope I can rein it in. I have been doing a lot of grocery and other shopping.

Keep an eye on/compare to previous months:

April 2020: Total monthly spend: $2,143.19.
Avg daily spend: $71.44.

March 2020--the effect of coronavirus quarantine and not working in NYC for now

Total monthly spend as of March 31: $1,916.15.

Avg daily spend: $61.81.

February 2020

Total monthly spend as of Feb. 29: $2,480.34.
Avg daily spend: $85.53.

TOTAL SPEND FOR MAY 2019: $2,348.24.

MAY AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $75.75. 

TOTAL SPEND FOR APRIL 2019: $3,634.28.

APRIL AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $121.14.

Catch-up--and Then Must Flatten/Punch Down the $$Dough Curve

Boy, this is a lot of info to record.

This food tracking reminds me of when I was a teenager on New Year's Eve--and, incidentally, slim, wearing slender brown jeans [yes, brown, I think a hand-me-down from my brother Will?]--and vowed to stop eating desserts/chocolate for the new year.

It was mainly a wish for better, Bonne Bell skin, no breakouts. Then, after the clock struck midnight, sweets would appear at the Bergaminis' lovely family party in New Rochelle, New York and my resolve was fleeting. The main attraction in the dining room was a local bakery treat that the Bergaminis, who had nine kids, called a meltaway--a Danish pastry with  a thick, buttery crumb top.

It would be easy to lose my resolve in recording all of this diary tracking on my blog, too. It is a big commitment.

Here is Wed/Thurs/Friday

TCOY

1. Figgy colored my hair.
2. Good facial care.
3. Taco night, thanks to Dan. Included fresh tomatoes and onions, ground turkey.
4. Thursday afternoon, sat in backyard for my call with therapist [Private Benjamin]. I was trying to emerge from a dark place and really didn't want to make the call at 3:30  pm. But I found wisdom, calm, perspective and compassion in that hour. And he and I heard the birds calling from the trees.
5. Walk with Dan, Sug and Punch on Thursday eve.
6. Spoke to P's counselor for help.
7. Walk in rain by myself on Friday eve.
8. Bought prepared vegs at good Italian store--broccoli w garlic, grilled and marinated artichokes.
9. Hot shower with Caffé Cacao Cellulite Scrub from Vesta! Felt good. Vesta brings local deliveries right to your door. 
10. Sitting on this couch for two+ hours and writing this post.

FOOD [really hard to remember the days after--jotted some down on Wed.]

Wednesday

• Iced coffee w half and half.
• Breakfast? oh, had to test one chilled lemon panna cotta in wedding china cup.
• lunch, leftover flounder, broccoli, rice.
• Individual Cozy Shack rice pudding.
• Some dark treats.
• Taco shell, ground turkey, cheese etc.
• Dark bark with low sugar, etc.
• Forget what else

Thursday

• Iced coffee w half and half.
• Split a prosciutto, mozzarella, arugula sandwich with Punch--curbside pickup from Sal's Gastronomia Cafe on Walnut Street.
• Made vegan beet brownies for Fig, with brown rice flour, pure maple syrup, dark cocoa. Had a couple with glass organic whole milk.
• Made broccoli-Swiss quiche for late lunch.
• Breakfast for dinner; 3 small pancakes, 3 pc. bacon, butter, pure maple syrup.
• Ritz crackers, cheese.
• Glass of organic whole milk.

Friday

• Coffee with whole milk.
• Late breakfast, 11:30, 4 small pancakes with butter and syrup.
• Late lunch, early dinner: Roast beef, melted Provolone, hot pepper sub.
• Some pasta with greens and sausage.
• Some sourdough bread with butter and some dunked in very good Italian pesto.
• Small chocolate croissant.
• Half of a small eggplant rollatini.
• Second coffee w whole milk.
• Another piece of beet brownie.
• Plan glass of local whole milk for nightcap.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

I received two payments. I paid the dentist a lot {we are still paying down a VERY BIG family bill, don't ask}. I caught up with payments to my therapist, which felt good. And of course a lot of the money went to our family bill account.

1. USPS.com, 2x Forever Earth Day stamps and some things I need as I plan Fig surprise, $44.
2. Sephora.com, 

Givenchy

Le Rouge Perfecto Beautifying Lip Balm in

01 Perfect Pink and  Lancôme HYPNÔSE DRAMA Instant Full Body Volume Mascara Excessive Black  I haven't worn makeup in about 8 weeks? except lipstick or lip balm. Want to define my eyes again. With free shipping, $68.77. 3. Araks.com, pretty white floral face mask for Sis, with 10 percent new shopper discount. Total with steep $10 shipping to Stamford, CT, $46.  I liked and Sis will like: In an effort to contribute to frontline workers’ safety and well being, for every face mask purchased, a medical-grade mask will be donated to a healthcare professional.  4. LottaJansdotter.com, two pop-of-color pillow covers from her pop-up sample sale shop, $59.71. Since Lotta lives down the block, curbside pickup. All profits go to a local Initiative here in Montclair called "Shield Our Heroes " Visit online shop: www.jansdotter.bigcartel.com 5. KINGS, I had an offer for free first delivery and filled my cart with 21 things the family will enjoy, from vegan to nonvegan to no-sugar-added, also large jug of Woolite and fancy Stonewall Kitchen Black Raspberry Jam, but with $8 tip, $182.06. Should arrive by early next week. 6. Rosario's, this place in town where foodies go for great Italian food and organic meats. I got a large organic marinated turkey flank (right word?); 4 organic housemade chicken sausages; large container mascarpone; broccoli w garlic; grilled and marinated artichokes; gnocchi; eggplant rollatini; large excellent housemade pesto; roast beef/hot pepper sub; large wedge imported Provolone; jar of capers. My family really enjoyed it, and plenty left for tomorrow. It was like eating out,--plus stocking up on ingredients--but a definite, infrequent splurge. $140.13. 7. Sweet Laurel in California, 3-pack of 100 percent cacao [no sugar] craft chocolate bars, plus shipping,  I love this label and this brand and have been waiting months to place an order. I love the bakery's aesthetic--roses on the labeling, flowers on the cakes. The shipping was really steep, $11, total $47.19. The Cake Shop is located on Sunset Blvd in Pacific Palisades....wow. 8. VESTA Chocolate, jar of homespun cacao cellulite scrub, other dark treats, free delivery, $53.31. Honestly trying to keep my fave Montclair small businesses afloat with orders here and there.

Total spend for 3 days: $639.11.

Ongoing monthly spend as of May 8: $859.25.

Avg daily spend: $107.41.

________________________________________________

Keep an eye on/compare to previous months:

April: Total monthly spend: $2,143.19.
Avg daily spend: $71.44.

March--the effect of coronavirus quarantine and not working in NYC for now

Total monthly spend as of March 31: $1,916.15.

Avg daily spend: $61.81.

February

Total monthly spend as of Feb. 29: $2,480.34.
Avg daily spend: $85.53.

January

Total monthly spend as of Jan 31: $3,063.60.

Avg daily spend: $98.83.

December 2019 [Christmas and all that entails]

Total monthly spend as of Dec. 31: $3,998.16. 

Avg daily spend: $128.97. 

November

Total spend for November (30 days): $2,979.03. 

Average daily spend: $99.30. 

October

Total spend for OCTOBER 31 days: $2,495.36.

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $80.49.

September

TOTAL SPEND FOR SEPTEMBER (30 DAYS): $2,214.43.

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $73.81.

August

TOTAL SPEND FOR AUGUST (31 DAYS/PLUS VACAY IN HERE): $2,895.06. ⬆️

AUGUST AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $93.39.  ⬆️

Afternoon at the Marina

Masks on, then off, in order to eat Italian subs and sip mimosas. Blowing out a birthday candle in a Whole Foods chocolate cupcake--from a distance.
Celebrating my sister. It was not without stress. We were outdoors at a picnic table and a nearby bench by the boat slips, so pretty, but Punch was hyper. Still, we took a short, Cape Cod-like walk on a boardwalk through the marsh grass. We saw my beloved Buttercup, my doggy niece.
Choppy waters. Punch pestering Figgy, Fig telling me that sitting on Sis’s terrace after lunch and scurrying in and out of her condo for coffee was mot part of the safe social distancing plan she had agreed to. We left shortly after that, walking away from the terrace instead of through the condo.
I half-jokingly called Fig the gestapo because she wouldn’t let me order and pay ahead and get an iced coffee to go via curbside pickup.We have to minimize our contact with people--and the number of stops we make.

I miss iced coffees to go.

#6total #meFigPunch #Sis #Herfriendanddaughter #keptourdistance #airhugs #outdoors

Good night.

TCOY

1. Short walk in Connecticut.
2. Seeing my Sis, tho stressful w pandemic guidelines to #flattenthecurve.
3. Ice water.

$ SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• Whole Foods, potting soil, 2 pots tiny daffs and bottle pure vanilla extract for Sis, 1 lb. grass-fed ground beef, veggie burgers, cheese, 1 lb. smoked salmon, wheat brioche buns, loaf multigrain bread, Vans waffles, 4-pack chocolate, cream-filled cupcakes, a small no-sugar cheesecake*, large OJ, Mom's Munchies vegan Skinny Mint chocolate cookie, recyclable plastic cups, eggs, 4-pack Italian blood orange sodas, veggie chips, vegan mushroom ravioli, 2 pints heavy cream, bananas, face wipes, chocolate oat milk, $123.70.

I discovered this brand at the Belfast Co-op in Maine.
It is from Freeport.

Will crunch numbers soon.

*You can find these "sugar conscious" cheesecakes in the refrigerated bakery case at Whole Foods. They contain ingredients like Cream Cheese (Pasteurized Milk and Cream, Salt, Stabilizers [Carob Bean Gum and/or Xanthan, Locust Bean, and Guar Gums], Cheese Culture), Maltitol, Eggs*, Lemon Juice*, Vanilla, and Crust (Flour*, Maltitol, Butter, Palm Oil, Eggs*, Water, Cocoa Powder, Cinnamon, Vanilla, Salt, Nutmeg)

Good Night, Friday--and a Chocolate Report

It was a crazy-ass morning in this little house. I couldn't fall asleep until 2 am after getting upset and nasty over something, so moved my morning alarm from 8 to 10. [I am not proud of my behavior. Do the next right thing, do your best at any given moment in time.]

We started school late....Punch had a lot of subjects to catch up on....Spanish....science [human anatomy]...social studies.....she was acting wild....it was not good.

It was another dreary, rainy day, and we were closed inside.

I put on my battle uniform--a skirt, black tank, pretty blouse, because fashion can be a shield against life's challenges. Then I slipped on my walking shoes, grabbed an umbrella, said I'm going out for a walk but I'll be back, and walked for over an hour, into and out of our beloved downtown. I looked at the signs in the windows of the businesses--Joyist, Little Daisy Bake Shop, Marcel, Chase Bank, Jackie's Grillette and Vesta Chocolate, where the lovely Julia beckoned me in and I stayed well over 6 feet away.

Cookies from VESTA.

I am very in love with Vesta. But since I'm not eating or drinking chocolate now,
I have gotten vegan oat-milk bark for Fig;
matcha treats and supreme $7 dark chocolate sea salt cacao-nib brownies
for Punch on special occasions; Julia's signature
granola--and a stylish, mod ceramic cup.
#ThisisMontclair #TheBestoftheBest

Vesta is shipping a lot of items, and I'm glad. They have a new Caffé Cacao Cellulite Scrub that sold out quickly [more to come, and I plan to order a jar] and Julia said articles mentioning the bean-to-bar business will be coming out in Forbes and New Jersey Monthly. Yay!

Thankfully, things were calmer by the time I walked back home.

AND, BIG SOCIAL ENGAGEMENT: Tomorrow, Figgy, Punch and I head to Stamford, Connecticut for Sis's bday, which is Sunday. The weather is supposed to be better tomorrow. I miss my Sis. I haven't seen her for a long time....sometime in March. It will be us, Sis, and her friend and her daughter and we are planning to stay outside at a table and chairs and keep social distance. Only girls allowed. :) Air hugs from far away. Individual servings, no shared food: Italian sandwiches from a shop; cupcakes; little bags of chips; cups of Prosecco with orange juice. We will wear masks, but have to take them off to eat and drink, of course.

Good night. I plan to get out of the house by 8:30 am to get on line for the Whole Foods in Montclair. I hope that is early enough--it opens 9 am. Maybe I better get there by 8:30 instead. Want to get to my online support group and that starts 9:30 on Zoom--I will be late.

TCOY

1. That long walk.
2. Collected lots of fallen sticks from some windy days this week. Filled a lawn and leaf bag to put at the curb.
3. Watched one episode of "The Closer."
4. Made a broccoli Cheddar quiche and Dahlia's Fragrant Chicken Fingers (Melissa Clark).

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

Zero.

Total daily spend: $0

Ongoing monthly spend as of April 24: $1,886.78.

Avg daily spend: $78.62.

Anniversary Flowers

Check this LINK to see the lushest, most luscious-looking flowers ever, designed by Amy at Studio Nectar.
I have seen them around town for more than a year, wishing for some because they are so exquisite, and they were on display this week alone at Vesta Chocolate and Joyist. Amy is even collaborating, I think, with Vesta.
She advertised her Valentine’s bouquets and I ordered one. I think it comes in a stemmed, retro-looking vase with a vintage ribbon tied around it.
Since Monday is our 29th wedding anniversary and tomorrow is Val Day, I ordered flowers for us. Can’t wait.
TCOY

1. 8 AM yoga class.
2. Made veggie burger on rye for lunch.
3. Spinach salad with dinner.
4. Bought another 15-class yoga card on sale. [Not listing here in $, figure it’s important for my body and mind.]
5. Short nap on couch under pink wool jblanket, when Dan went to get Punch at ice rink.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET
In addition to putting my earnings from writing to paying $440 for heating oil and $300 child care today:

• 29th anniversary flowers in vase, delivered tomorrow, $110. Dream bouquet.
• ShopRite groceries, $107.87.
• Layla black ribbed knit turtleneck, free shipping, about $30. Sale. This was with my email signup 20 percent discount.

Will crunch numbers tomorrow. Good night.