Wednesday, October 20, 2010
The Good, the Bad & the Ugly
Let me just cut right to the chase. Good is blue; bad is in red; ugly is purple.
About to take long soak in lavender-scented bubble bath. After washing face gently and caring for teeth. Then am going to sleep for 8.5 hours.
Beautiful orange leaves I saw on trees today--at Brookdale Park, on Montclair streets, driving back to Clifton.
Figgy just introduced me to Celestial Seasonings Mandarin Orange Spice Tea, and I'm having a nice tall cup. I like it. Maybe there's hope in learning to sooth my soul without frenzied eating, but civilized sipping instead.
I saw Sis today at Van Dyk Manor and together, we lifted Dad's spirits. Don, H., Sug and Figgy were there too.
It's sweater weather--fun to pull out the cardigans and sweater jackets, and layer them over tops and tanks.
I went to boot camp this morning and sprinted.
The layer cake I worked hard to make Sis last night was only very ordinary. We had it today at Van Dyk, and sang happy birthday to her, even though the cake was six months late. [I did deliver my present on time.] It was Sunshine Cake with Citrus Butter Cream, from epicurious.com. I love a lot of recipes on that site, but this one was disappointing, even after all that grating and squeezing [lemons and oranges, both peel and juice] and cooking the frosting. The cake texture was like cornbread. I felt bad. I wanted the cake I made Sis to be perfect. Her favorite is a butter cake with citrus frosting, and that's why I tried this. Should have stuck with the one from The Joy of Cooking, which I made her one summer on Cape Cod--she loved it.
The granite I chose in August for the bathroom is finally in place on the white beadboard vanity in our house. It is very lovely. But minor, minor problem: It doesn't match the beautiful tile around the shower and tub. I think I brought a floor tile with me to do the matching, and though the floor tile goes with the tub tile, the tub tile [primarily sand-colored] does not go with the vanity top [gray and white]. There's nothing we can do at this point except try to pull the granite and the tub together with chrome handles on the shower doors to unite the two visually. And, I clipped a gorgeous pink-tinted yellow rose off the bush in our front yard and put it in a sailboat glass on the vanity. That instantly made me feel better, and gave me hope.
My teenager hates me [feels that way a lot of the time, anyway].
Dad wants to go home, but he has no home at the moment, and besides, as was confirmed in our meeting at Van Dyk today, he needs skilled nursing care.
Anxiety. High anxiety. About both big and little things.
Bad hair day.
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She doesn't hate you. You know that. Teenagers are brain damaged but I'm told they grow out of it. Someday she'll ask for your Thanksgiving recipes because she can't be home with you but she'll want it to be just like it was now, and your heart will overflow.
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I'm apparently the meanest person in the county today for imposing completely unreasonable restrictions on my 11 year old. As in if she's too sick to go to school, she's too sick to have friends over.
Nan...thank you for helping me see some humor--and beauty/promise re. Thanksgiving recipes. i remember having to set that rule too about if you're home sick from school, you can't see friends. learned it from my friend Jean, who has six kids. you have all the right instincts and i thank you again for your perspective and kindness, nan. love alice
ReplyDeleteTeenagers just act like they hate us. It's their job (just like our job, as parents, is to embarrass them in front of cute boys – my father was so good at that). Then they grow up and tell you how much they loved you. It will happen. Really.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait to see your new bathroom. You are right; chrome will unite the granite and the tiles, and so will the right color towels and accents.
My parenting gurus once told me this parallel and it helps (sometimes): A toddler needs to stop being a baby and start being a kid. To do this, she pushes you away and it's often a painful process (for you and the toddler; think tantrums). Similarly, a teen needs to stop being a kid and start being an adult. And, to do so, again she pushes you away and again it can be so painful. But I think Nan and Linda are right. We all will live through it and come out on the other end a little battered, but still in love--them and us, with each other.
ReplyDeleteHi Lin, and Hi Kim. Thanks for the supportive notes. I appreciate them. For some strange reason, today was a better teen day. Person in question told me she loved me not once but three times in the last 24 hours and went for a walk with me and talked heart to heart to me about something. We also shopped for and cooked dinner together, which was good. Sometimes I just really feel for her, what it was like to be a teen and feel everything so deeply. Lin, it's funny that Uncle Aldo did that embarrassing you with the cute boys. ;) p.s. send my best to Lori love alice
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