Working It in Red Shoes

Tory Burch Georgia Ballet Flats in Triple Red suede, on sale now for $129. I love the square toe, but admit they will look better on a demure foot than in my size 11. But still....

Pops of crimson footwear rocked two nights in a row this week at NYC events.

At a Work Like a Girl Q & A Tuesday on the Upper West Side (led by Erika Ayers Badan, kick-ass CEO and thinker, with trend forecaster Valerie Jacobs), a woman in the audience wore fresh red flats with dark neutral pants. The pants were the foil and the shoes were the pretty, energizing grounding. Like all flats, they looked good worn barefoot (or with low-cut, no-show Peds). Your pant hem should not drag or pool over the skimmers. Trim cropped or skinny pants work best. The shape of the shoe was feminine, the way it framed the foot, but not unprofessional. Fun. Work Like a (Very Smart) Girl and look good doing it, too.

For the on-stage discussion between Katie Couric and Bobbi Brown at the 92nd Street Y re the new book Still Bobbi, Katie chose strappy red slingbacks with a kitten heel. Bare legs, white button-down shirt, black and white delicately patterned midi-length skirt. The shoes were everything. Smooth-looking, shapely legs help. Made me think about how I need to moisturize more with a nice body butter. (Hello, looking at Homecourt's new body collection.)

And there was an audience question about red lipstick. Can everyone wear it?

"Absolutely not," Bobbi said. The color makes a strong statement and not everyone can or even wants to own that. It depends on your personality, she noted. On who you are.

"Does anyone in the audience have on red lipstick tonight?" she asked, to prove her point. One woman near the front waved her hand and pointed proudly to her mouth. But the auditorium was darkened.

Oh, and Bobbi had a clean, short mani in Poppy, her signature orange-red color. I've seen her wearing it on Instagram. I bought it in town at the Jones Road store and I love it, for pedis and manis. My home mani lasted for 5+ days without chips, and I do a lot of dishes and garden without gloves. The kit includes a two-in-one base and top coat.

I enjoy soaking up events like these not just for style and substance watching but also for being at the heartbeat of it all, New York, New York. 

The magical ruby slippers Judy Garland, age 16, wore in "The Wizard of Oz," 1939. Showing their age here, and drab and depressing compared to today's color-drenched footwear. 

Photo from The Smithsonian.

16 Sweet Gratitudes, Catching Up

1. New Prada lipstick in the house. I bought my first tube in mid-May at the Nordstrom flagship in NYC and used it down to the nub. The colors are so stylish. Prada is so stylish. A lot of lettuce, $50 plus tax, but very worth it. The counter guru helped me find two great hues in person now. But the matte is a bit drying, so best to put the Prada lip balm under or on top, or even dab on Vaseline.
2. Lunch with young MTM*, my colleague and friend, a couple of Sundays ago in Princeton. We ate on Witherspoon Street. MTM had a salad and I had the chicken pot pie. It was a beautiful day, and we had been talking about reconnecting for years. :)
3. Chef Lidia Bastianich at the Ferguson Library in Stamford on a weeknight with Sis and Diane. We soaked up Lidia's hints, such as how to tell if you're buying real Italian San Marzano tomatoes. If a food is made in Italy, the packaging will say PRODUCT OF ITALY, Lidia said. I used that rule when selecting prosciutto last weekend.
4. "A Wonderful World, The Louis Armstrong Musical" on Broadway. I went to the matinee yesterday with Sis and Edie. It was.very.very.good. I've played Satchmo's music today. 
5. Post-theater dinner two blocks away at Patsy's, a landmark Italian restaurant and celeb magnet on West 56th Street since 1944. Best shrimp scampi with spaghetti that I have ever eaten. In my life. The simple pan sauce was intuitively done, "broiled with butter, garlic and lemon," per the menu. Tender butterflied shrimp. And if I were still indulging in desserts, I'm quite sure the ones I eyed on the old-fashioned rolling cart, pushed by a waiter, would have been winning. Especially that fancy ruffled chocolate cake or tiramisu.
6. "Conclave" film about electing/selecting a Pope. Dan and I saw it on opening night of the  Montclair Film Festival. Very well done. The acting (Ralph Fiennes, Isabella Rossellini, Stanley Tucci, John Lithgow) is superb as are the settings and secret rituals of selecting a Pope. Director Edward Berger was there at the Wellmont Theater and took questions afterward.
7. The New Yorker Festival. Drove into NYC with my friend Anne to see New Yorker Magazine editor David Remnick interview Rachel Maddow.
8. The cold opening of SNL last night, Saturday, November 2, with Maya Rudolph and the real Kamala Harris. (Thank you, Nan, for texting link.)
9. A hike in the Stamford arboretum woods with Sis and Galena.
10. Walks around our block and in Anderson Park and Edgemont Park.
11. Tea nightcap at Figgy's apartment the other night.
12. Dinner in a Dumont tavern with Moey and Tish.
13. "Godzilla" movie. Newest version, made by Japanese writer and director Takashi Yamazaki. 
14. Ina Garten's memoir.
15. Seeing my friend Rachy for late breakfast, another thing that's been put off for months.
16. Work clients, including two new ones. I'm grateful.

I just realized many of these are Italian--numbers 1, 3, 5 and 6. And 12 is famous for its pizza.

*Dan gave my friend Eileen the "young MTM" nickname decades ago, before she was married, when we went to a party she hosted in Weehawken in her pretty little Mary Tyler Moore-style apartment with a view of NYC's sparkling skyline across the river.

"Standing By Peaceful Waters"

This pretty little book was published in 1973. I picked it up and put it back a few times over the years in the Cape Cod gift shop--I can't remember if it was at the National Seashore Visitor Center or the Wellfleet Bay Wildlife Sanctuary. I've known their book inventories pretty well, with all that compounded vacation time to browse by peaceful waters. The colorful illustrated cover and the title called out to me, even if I never in my life make Beach Plum Jelly. I finally bought the soft cover one year and just rediscovered it on the bookshelves in my home office. 

With quiet time alone this week, I've been reading it. Wonderful work by Elizabeth Post Mirel (who had three young children at the time, including a baby) with graceful illustrations by Betty Fraser. I do want the kind of calm where I make a pocket of time to read Plum Crazy, because it evokes a place and a passion. Our long-time Cape Cod friends Rite and Bob picked beach plums. I don't know if I ever learned to recognize the fruit until now, but there may be some nearby here in Connecticut.

Sis flew to the Southwest (New Mexico) to travel with her Peace Corps friend and family and called on me to dog-sit her enchanting pup, Galena, for more than a week. I walk that girly at least three times a day, and never sleep past 8, because she doesn't.

I'm loving it. Sis still gets The New York Times paper edition delivered daily. I sat on the sofa drinking in the Sunday Styles section. I met my friend/magazine colleague Mary Kate, who lives nearby, for a lovely catch-up breakfast in Cos Cob (part of Greenwich). I went to Mass in Stamford, and then asked Google to find the nearest Whole Foods, so ended up in high-end Darien midday Sunday, where I felt like a fish out of moneyed water. Two striking blonde women (not together) wore little immaculate white pleated tennis skirts, in perfect contrast to their golden tans. They were coming from or going to the courts. Eyewear was on trend, as were baby carriers and the handsome young dads wearing them for weekend duty. Some branded local products (cacao pudding and whipped bath scrub) were tempting but both went the way of beautiful Ice Cream Tulip bulbs, named for their double ice-cream-cone like blooms, but over my budget. The children, for the most part, seemed well-mannered. The place was packed. Though the store was mostly stocked with the same products our Montclair Whole Foods carries, I felt an imbalance, shall we say, which I never feel in my diverse hometown.

Behold luscious Ice Cream Tulips. I want to add some to our spring garden. 

You can also find Strawberry Ice Cream Tulips (red) 

and Banana Ice Cream Tulips (yellow). 

If I revisit Darien Whole Foods, I will buy a bag of bulbs.

Galena and I have been marina-gazing here in Shippan Point, turning our faces to the birds flying over the harbor and crossing paths with baby deer and other dogs (Pluto, Milo, Bo, etc.). We went to a small beach and walked out on the fishing pier, which has evenly spaced holes in the railings to rest poles while prepping bait or waiting for a bite.

When we go out back on the short boardwalk path by tall feathery grass and a snow egret, Galena and I stop by the plaque that commemorates the trade between two chiefs of Onax Tribe No. 41, International Order of Red Men, and a white British captain in 1640 and memorialized for the city of Stamford in 1916. The original owners swapped this beauty for some coats, glasses, knives, kettles, wampum and a few other things. Read more about that here (excellent report by Chase Wright).

Harbors are calm, harbors are good, whether our paths are charted or uncharted. Which brings me to these beautiful lyrics from "Lake Marie," by John Prine, released in 1995:

We were standing

Standing by peaceful waters

Standing by peaceful waters.....

SPOKEN: Many years ago along the Illinois-Wisconsin Border

There was this Indian tribe

They found two babies in the woods

White babies

One of them was named Elizabeth

She was the fairer of the two

While the smaller and more fragile one was named Marie

Having never seen white girls before

And living on the two lakes known as the Twin Lakes

They named the larger and more beautiful Lake, Lake Elizabeth

And thus the smaller lake that was hidden from the highway

Became known forever as Lake Marie...

Onward now...

Correction: When I wrote this post on the fourth floor of the Shops at Hudson Yards in NYC yesterday, I put the wrong date for the tribal trade. It was 1640, not 1612. The plaque commemorates the original July 1, 1640 sale by American Indian Chiefs Ponus and Wascussue to British Capt. Nathaniel Turner, an agent for the New Haven Colony.

Joan Didion + Prayer

Joan Didion, John Gregory Dunne and Quintana Roo, likely in Malibu, 

or somewhere else on the California coastline. 

Photo by Julian Wasser from here.

I'm reading Blue Nights, a memoir by Ms. Didion. Much of the weave connects moments with and memories of her daughter, Quintana Roo. Quintana was adopted. 

I have loved the author's crisp, precise writing since I took Slouching Towards Bethlehem, an essay collection, from my sister's book shelf in our shared bedroom to read on the long bus ride to Atlantic City to visit my boyfriend. Words carefully parsed, sentences lean and slim, but they say so much. They say everything.

Something in Ms. Didion's steeliness, especially for such a small woman, inspires me. She sees it and says it. I also read that she enjoyed buying beautiful clothing, such a little cashmere sweater, for her girl or herself, sometimes even matching. I did that, too, with Figgy and later, Punch (though not matching for Punch, since she was away from our fold from age 15 months to 6.5 years).  

Dan returned on the red-eye today after being flown out to Palm Springs to write 60-Second Novels at a fancy party at the Dinah Shore estate. He was home by 11 a.m. and then had to leave by 6 p.m. (in an Uber, still no running car) to write stories at a party in NYC, a bar mitzvah.

I was so low. So low about many things. Coincidence that Figgy moved out a week ago yesterday? Did the significance of that escape me? I'm happy for her, and she is happy, building an IKEA dresser with her friend, choosing pretty accent colors for her bedroom, setting up her plants. But with her absence, I'm fretting these days over worries I have about Punch and Young Romeo. With Figgy gone and Dan away, my lens has zoomed in and frozen. I need to zoom out.

Our kitchen sink is backed up. Don't ask, we had an expensive new garbage disposal installed but we can't turn it on until an electrician or two comes to install an outlet under the sink, since this model has a plug. I managed to catch up on all the dishes, by hand (vintage china) and in the dishwasher tonight. I have a half-price-after-Easter pot of tulips on the mantel. Can't tell what color yet, since the flowers keep their secrets in those tight green hoods.

I went on two Zoom support groups today and made two phone calls. I prayed, in fear and desperation. Over the known and unknown, over things I can't control. I think I am okay.

Good night.

Is 8:30 p.m. Too Early for Bed?

No. It is not too early. 

I rose at 7:45 a.m., brewed a big pot of Copper Cow Vietnamese vanilla coffee, cooked tortellini and sauce to put in Punchy's lunch tote, handled a visit from the plumber and his assistant about our broken garbage disposal, weathered high-octane stress and drama before Punch went to school, did my weekly DBT therapy on telehealth and worked on assignments and/or invoices for three clients. I didn't even take a nap. 

See Eloise at the top of the ladder? I love this illustration by Hilary Knight from the story of a little girl that I used to read to Figgy sometimes at bedtime. I will pretend I'm reading it to myself now. Image from here.  I forgot that Hilary was a man.

Bonus points because I ate three healthy meals that included fruits and/or vegs instead of skittering into junk food.

B: Whipped cottage cheese with fresh strawberries.

L: Tuna on whole-grain with roasted red peppers on the side.

D: Leftover One-Pot Pasta with Ricotta and Lemon from the NY Times that I made last night with elbow macaroni and handfuls of watercress and fresh spinach as Melissa Clark suggests in the intro. Pronounced notes of fresh lemon juice and peel, red pepper flakes, fine Parmigiano Reggiano sourced from Van Hook Cheese & Grocery, a fancy purveyor in Montclair. (I bought a small wedge at Dry Goods Refillery on this end of town. It's fun to shop there, farm milk and eggs, solid shampoo bars, local products, tablets and glass spray bottles to make your own cleaning products instead of heaping more plastic in landfills.) 

Sometimes, on Cape Cod, especially when Figgy was little and we had put her on the tandem bike behind Dan's bike and pedaled for miles on the bike path, we would be exhausted and all three hit the hay by 8:30, once we got back home.  

We are not on the Cape with a young girl but we are Monday-night tired. Time to lower the blinds and rest. And now it's closing in on 9:30.

Good night.

Self-Care

I've been working for a long time to reclaim self-care. I somehow lost it when I became a mother, first gradually and then swiftly. Actually, it started sneakily when Dan and I were first "locked in" (a term used now to signify being in a committed relationship). But that is a story for another post.

Nice self-care today:

• Walked around the block once.
• Took a long bath with coconut oil and lavender. My body told me she needed a long soak, and I paid attention.
• Listened to a novel on Kindle on our Alexa speaker. Letters from Eleanor Roosevelt  is set in the 1960s. I love it. "Alexa" read to me while I took a bath.
• Ate turkey chili I made with peppers, tomatoes, onions, garlic, EVOO and of course beans. That was healthy but unfortunately, my other eating today was not. It was scattered and rangy. And the more out of gear, fearful, anxious or hurt I feel, the rangier it gets. Also, having party leftovers in our house is a trigger for me (cheese, crackers etc.) Tomorrow is another day.
• Related to my rangy eating, got tired and took a nap.
• Went to support group in town at 7 p.m. Helpful and inspiring. It was a long haul during the pandemic without in-person meetings.
• Threw in some laundry.

Yes, even with all that, I did fit in some work.

Good night, sweethearts.

My Weekend Documentary Immersion

 Author and editor back in the day, above, and below, now. 

Images from SonyClassics.com.

I love a good documentary, strung together from close-up views, pearls of truth, about real life. And I love that our town is home to Montclair Film*, which runs the nonprofit Clairidge Theater on Bloomfield Avenue. Last night, when Dan was out with our friend Michael at an event, I slipped out to the 6:30 p.m. showing of “Turn Every Page.”

TEP explores the 50-year relationship between New Yorkers Bob Caro (now age 87, celebrated, diligent author of The Power Broker and the fat Lyndon Johnson biography volumes) and his editor, legendary Bob Gottlieb, now 91, who has edited John Cheever, Doris Lessing, Salman Rushdie, Michael Crichton, Toni Morrison, Nora Ephron and other stellar writers. (He was also editor in chief of The New Yorker.) The film is directed by Lizzie Gottlieb, Bob’s daughter, with a warmth, candor and permission to be curious that only a daughter can have with her dad.

I resisted the brownie bites from local Little Daisy Bake Shop and the rich, silken dark chocolate-covered almonds from Sweet Home Montclair at the concession stand, and slipped into my comfortable seat in the renovated theater. To see two geniuses talking about their crafts, immersed in their crafts, to actually see how they work and see their edits on the paper pages. SO GOOD. To learn about their backgrounds--what made them who they are. What shaped them. It is just delicious. 

It’s a tribute to the golden days of publishing, and to the old-fashioned, hard-driven craft of writing. (Caro still writes on an electric typewriter.) It is purely brilliant and, like the best documentaries, it peels back the velvet movie-theater curtains to show us what we really crave: true stories.  

And then, Sunday morning at the movies! I usually go to my support group or Mass, or sometimes both on a Sunday morning. Today I drove to the former and stayed only 25 minutes and went to the church of the cinema with Dan. We saw the 10:45 a.m. showing of the five Oscar-nominated documentary shorts, and we were blown away. The list included:

1. “How Do You Measure a Year?” (Dad interviews daughter every year on her birthday, from age 2 to 18.)
2. “The Elephant Whisperers,” about a couple who rehabilitates orphaned elephants in India. Click now to watch on Netflix. Required viewing.
3. “Haulout,” about the effects of global warming on walruses in Siberia, by focusing on a marine biologist who works alone in their midst.
4. “Stranger at the Gate,” about a man who killed many Muslims in the war and then lived in Muncie, Indiana with a shocking plan for the local mosque.
5. “The Martha Mitchell Effect,” about the blonde firecracker who was married to Nixon’s attorney general, John Mitchell.

I can’t say enough about these. But our favorite was the elephants....so, so good. Breathtaking subjects and breathtaking filming. And after that, it was Martha.

Such fun at the movies.

*Per Wikipedia: Montclair Film is a nonprofit most well known for organizing the annual Montclair Film Festival (MFF) usually held in late April, early May in Montclair, NJ. The festival showcases new works from American and international filmmakers, and has year-round events.

Notable advisory board members include J.J. Abrams, Jonathan Alter, Stephen Colbert, Abigail Disney, Olympia Dukakis, Chiwetal Ejiofor, Emma Freud, Laura Linney, Jon Stewart, Julie Taymor, and Patrick Wilson, among others.  

(I have seen Patrick Wilson getting healthy green juices in town and Stephen Colbert at Mass.)

A Dreamer and Her Big Santa-Size Sack of Books for Road Trips

Vintage magazines and recipe booklets are so enchanting--especially the holiday-themed ones. This Farm Journal is from 1966; my neighbor’s Mom saved it.

When I go on my New England overnight road trips--here to Cape Cod, or to visit our family in Maine, Meg and Greg in Vermont or Sis in Connecticut--I bring so many books. (I also brought several on the August 16 girls’ trip to Florida with Figgy, Florida Orange and Skipper, since we were driving there and back.)

It’s as if I think I can catch up on what I want to do in my life--read more--while I am away from home responsibilities for an overnight or longer. And when you drive--without any real baggage limitations or extra fees--it is easy to throw in another and another book.

Besides, I can’t predict if I will be in the mood to read about Cape Cod, page through a novel or learn more ways to tie a scarf.

It’s 10 p.m., and I changed into my red plaid flannel PJ bottoms and soft cotton top from The Salty Crown in Orleans. I would like to blog about Cape Cod now, but if I do, I won’t have read any of the pages in any of the books that I brought this time. 

We head home tomorrow. I’m choosing to read after tallying this list of books I brought. Eccentric to tote such a portable library? Maybe. Yes.

1. Cape Cod, Henry David Thoreau
2. 6 in a Ford, A Tale of a Nation-Wide Tour by a Family from Maine, Marion C. Holmes, gift from Dan found at old book shed in Maine
3. Trending into Maine, Kenneth Roberts, ditto
4. How to Tie a Scarf, 33 Styles
5. A softcover 12-Step book
6. A hardcover 12-Step book
7. A 12-Step dictionary to better understand the words
8. Own It: The Secret to Life, Diane von Furstenberg
9. Shirley Jackson: A Rather Haunted Life, Ruth Franklin, gift from Sis
10. Brave Enough, Cheryl Strayed, gift from Figgy
11. What Would Jackie Do?, Shelly Branch and Sue Callaway, gift from my neighbor
12. Start Where You Are: A Journal for Self-Exploration
13. The Vanishing Half, Brit Bennett, Kate’s copy lent to me (book group)
14. Girl Scouts Handbook, W.J. Hoxie, gift from Sis
15. Java Head, Joseph Hergesheimer, copyright 1946, chosen at little free library cabinet at Snowy Owl Coffee Roasters in Brewster today (IDK what the book is about yet but it’s a pretty vintage edition)
16. Race and the Cosmos, Barbara A. Holmes, from the same library box--I thought it might interest Dan
17. Waterproof guide: Tidepools of the North Atlantic
18. Waterproof guide: The Ultimate Guide to Shells of the New England Coast and Beach Life
19. The Care and Keeping of Friends
20. Drew, holiday issue of the magazine from Drew Barrymore, bought at CVS in Montclair

And oh! My neighbor Beth was just going through her mom’s belongings and knows I love cookbooks, recipe brochures etc. So this time, I slipped these cute old reads into my Lilly laptop case. Their vintage typefaces and photos!!!

• Recipes for Happy Holidays and Goodies for Giving
• Recipes with the Marshmallow Fluff Touch
• Betty Crocker’s Cakes Kids Love for Birthdays, Holidays, Any Day
• Martha Holme’s Holiday Recipes, from the Peoples Gas Light and Coke Company, 122 S. Michigan Avenue
• Farm Journal’s Christmas Book, copyright 1966

Thank you to Beth and her mom!

Good night.

Lovely Book Group

Karen hosted our book group at 5 pm; five of us were there. Two couldn’t make it.

Karen is a gardener by trade and she and her husband, Keith, have a beautiful backyard. So tranquil and green, with flowers and candles. They set up lounge and regular chairs at a distance in a circle. Icy cold bottles of vino were served and Karen made mixed berry crisp with homemade peach ice cream (!) and freshly whipped cream.

Since I’m skirting sugar, I had icy seltzer, a little rich cheese, hummus, raw vegs and some tortilla chips.

We talked about how horrifying it was to think of the black women Toni Morrison wrote about in Song of Solomon. How (this was 1931) they were not able to give birth in the whites-only hospital, only on its steps. (I know this is a novel, but assume this ugliness is based in historical truth.) There are no words to effectively express how unjust and cruel that was. How humiliating. And unsafe. How exposed those women must have felt, and how frightened.

Then that led us to talking about the higher rate of birth complications and low birth weights among black women still, and then about having babies as older moms--two of us were 40 (not me, though I tried that).

And on and on, from vital issues to baking tips...how we hope our daughters will know not to wait too long for babies, the horror of what is happening in Kenosha, Wisconsin--and the berry blend Karen likes best for crisps (frozen mixed berries from Costco, delivered during this time of COVID-19).

Good night.

Spending Spree--and Yet, the Sadness Persists [of Course It Does]

The book is appropriately small, about
6.5 x 8.5 inches. Judith Jones is a magical name in the publishing world.
[See below.] Her beef stew sounds like it
will nicely feed me and Punch, the only
meat eaters in the house--and Sug will surely beg for a nibble.

Things have been rocky with raising Punch. And when that happens, I tend to overspend, instead of take stock of our strengths and the blessings we have, the wind and the godspeed that can power us through rough seas. Some of this spending was essential [groceries for meals, new bike lock, new air pump, both long overdue] but some was just to cheer myself up.

• Amazon, Salt on a Robin's Tail paperback by my friend Celia's friend Andrea Kott. It's a memoir and sounds really good.   
  • Salt on a Robin’s Tail: An Unlikely Jewish Journey Through Childhood, Forgiveness and Hope, is a true story of love and loss, struggle and survival, despair and hope. It shatters stereotypes, and inspires reconciliation with painful pasts. Salt On a Robin’s Tail | Andrea Kott andreakott.org/salt-on-a-robins-tail/  With shipping and tax, $21.31.
• Amazon, SKINNY DIPPED ALMONDS SuperDark + Sea Salt Chocolate Covered Almonds, 0.46 Ounce Mini Bags, 24 Count, free shipping, $24.99 plus tax. I read about these via Nutritionist Sam, the nutrition/diet/fitness editor at Good Housekeeping who was handpicked by my friend--the great Delia Hammock--when she retired. Sam has really good advice. Our paths at work crossed briefly.
• Greenwich Avenue parking meter with Sis, 25 cents.
• Out of the Box fashion store on Greenwich Avenue, feminine floral skirt marked down from $168 to $45, with tax, $47.86.
• Iced coffees and biscotti for Sis and me, plus tip, $15.59.
• Kings, Instacart doorstep delivery today, w service fee and tip: 2 half-gallons organic reduced-fat milk; good rye bread; 1 pound good deli turkey; Acme smoked whitefish spread; brioche buns, which Punch loves; organic strawberries; 6 large bananas; Food for Life sprouted almond cereal; and 2 frozen Phillips crab cakes for Dan and Punch dinner, $77.58. 
• Starbucks, Montclair, grande decaf iced coffee plus big $3 tip since first Starbucks drink since March, $6.47.
• Ditto, enticement, curbside pickup to get Punch up and out early yesterday for 2 hours at doctor's office for physical, bloodwork etc, screening for behavioral program. She got 2 egg/bacon/Gouda breakfast sandwiches and one very tall iced drink, $14.20.
• Bank fees, $4.25.
• Watchung Booksellers, back-door pickup in Montclair, $28.75. The book is The Pleasures of Cooking for One by Judith Jones. It is an endearing book that I saw in the bookshop on my day trip to Southampton last summer but didn't have the money to buy it. Judith Jones (née Bailey; March 10, 1924 – August 2, 2017)^[1] was an American writer and editor, best known for having rescued The Diary of Anne Frank from the reject pile.^[2] Jones also championed Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking.^[3][4] She retired as senior editor and vice president at Alfred A. Knopf in 2011.^[5] Jones was also a cookbook author.....  I could have gotten the book much cheaper online, but when I can, I like to support my independent bookstore. It is a keepsake book and I will remember the special place where I first saw it last summer and the place I got it now.
• Figgy--I felt like giving to this hardworking college-loan holder, $20.
• Vesta Chocolate,  bag of pure cacao nibs [no sugar], 2 iced coffee drinks, 1 cacao sea salt brownie, $26 plus $3 cash tip because many small businesses are not making it and we love Vesta, $29. [We found out Joyist is closing permanently. Sad.]
• Ditto, gift bag of 3 cacao sea salt brownies for Punchy's friend's zoom bday, 1 sea salt chocolate chip cookie each for Elaine and Punch, rounded up to next dollar, $31.
• Local Jackie's Grillette, lamb and feta sandwich to last two meals, iced tea, iced coffee, 1/2 gallon organic milk, head of cauliflower, one orange pepper, one loaf local Nicolo's Italian bread, with generous tip, $37.48.
• Kings, large cart of groceries in person Sunday night: pork chops, fresh turkey burgers, vegan veggie burgers, regular veggie burgers, butter, tortilla chips, pita chips, large fresh baby spinach, bread, cantaloupe, Jarlsberg Lite slices, 3 oz. 88 percent dark chocolate bar, bag of potting soil, citronella candle, dog treats, Van's waffles, diet orange soda, large jar wheat germ, 2 half-gallons organic 2 percent milk, cashews, dried figs, and many other items, $213.
• Flowering garden plants [pink and white impatiens, red and white verbena, snapdragons, more] chosen with Punch, She planted a few today. $41.90. The pure whites made me think of the white clothing worn at George Floyd's funeral.
• Artigiano Jewel Box, the wonderful artisan treasure trove designed by Andrea Schettino in my hometown of Dumont. I was feeling especially hopeless and sad today about charting P’s path and how to help her, and I ordered this watermelon tourmaline pendant. Remember what I heard: Pink lifts the spirits of the wearer and those who see her or him. Here is the LINK. I love the handcrafted sterling silver setting. With shipping, $141.03.
• The Bail Project. Our great neighbors Liliana and Michael bought Black Lives Matter lawn signs and handed them out to those who want them, with a suggestion of places where to donate. $25.87.
• Montclair Bikery, sturdy new lock and impressive bike pump, $72.44.
• The Closer, season 4 on Netflix, $29.99.

total spend Friday, June 5 to Thursday, June 11:  $889.28.

ongoing monthly spend as of June 11:  $1,373.59.

avg daily spend: $124.87. As of now, this is more than twice as much as my avg. daily spend in March, when coronavirus took hold. I hope I can rein it in. I have been doing a lot of grocery and other shopping.

Keep an eye on/compare to previous months:

April 2020: Total monthly spend: $2,143.19.
Avg daily spend: $71.44.

March 2020--the effect of coronavirus quarantine and not working in NYC for now

Total monthly spend as of March 31: $1,916.15.

Avg daily spend: $61.81.

February 2020

Total monthly spend as of Feb. 29: $2,480.34.
Avg daily spend: $85.53.

TOTAL SPEND FOR MAY 2019: $2,348.24.

MAY AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $75.75. 

TOTAL SPEND FOR APRIL 2019: $3,634.28.

APRIL AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $121.14.

Another Dark Day

Left, calming book, A Guide to the Best Ponds on Cape Cod, 
by Susan Baur, Turtle Press, 2018

No sun, no fun.

Homeschooling was a nightmare and the little darling snuck and spit out her schoolday medicine.

Increasingly, this is something I'm on the lookout for. Oppositional behavior. Don't ask. We later gave her one of her short-acting pills, but it had little effect.

I tried, but we didn't get far with math, science [draw a skeleton, share tomorrow morning in Zoom meeting with teacher] or Spanish. She did her ELA classwork.

She did group counseling with a few kids on Google meet and had weekly therapy via FaceTime with her therapist.

We might start DBT therapy together. I hear it is very pricey. Therapist gave me  number to call. If it helps, okay. Figgy did some of that in high school.

I wish I had a more upbeat message tonight, but I don't. I'm at the end of my rope.

It's 7:59 pm and I''m about to retreat to the bedroom and read a book about the best ponds on Cape Cod [see above]--which I bought a few years ago at the gift shop at Mass Audubon Wellfleet Bay Wildlife Sanctuary. I pretty much treasure every little thing I've found there.

Good night. Dan and Figgy taking over.

Mon-daze

Great read.

Feel tired. Ready to slip into nightie, here it is only 8:34 PM, and curl up with great book, South Toward Home. It's a collection of essays/columns by one of my favorite authors, Julia Reed.

TCOY
1. Bought some healthy groceries [lox, dried golden figs, gallon organic milk, etc.--and striking orange ruffled tulips] at ShopRite, where everything is more affordable.
2. Ate some peppers and tomatoes.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• ShopRite, including Provolone, vegan mock mozzarella shreds, pita chips for Punch, whole-wheat bread, $62.71.
• CVS, melatonin gummies for Punch and 3-portion bag of Cheez Doodles, $11.88.

total daily spend: $74.59.

ongoing monthly spend as of March 2: $92.59.

avg daily spend: $46.30.

Good Night to You

Figgy got me the 150th anniversary hardcover edition, above, of Little Women for my birthday. About to curl up with it. Punch likes it, too. And the cover is beautiful.

Good night.

TCOY

1. Ate a little of Figgy's tofu stir-fry. Does that count?
2. Worked productively. Does that count?
3. Private Benjamin appt. Yay, had not been since Jan. 10.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• Grove Deli, sandwich, Diet Snapple and small jar tip, $11. Stared down chips.
• Vesta Chocolate, small dark Dominican Republic hot chocolate made with oat milk; jar of handcrafted hazelnut spread, plus tip, $31.
• Parking meter, 35 cents.

total daily spend: $42.35.

ongoing monthly spend as of Jan. 30: $3,025.60.

avg daily spend: $100.85.

COMPARE TO LAST 5 MONTHS:

december 2019 [Christmas and all that entails]

total monthly spend as of Dec. 31: $3,998.16. 

avg daily spend: $128.97. 
__________________________________________________________________

Total spend for November (30 days): $2,979.03. 

Average daily spend: $99.30. 

__________________________________________________________________

TOTAL SPEND FOR OCTOBER (31 DAYS): $2,495.36.

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $80.49.

_____________________________________________________________________

TOTAL SPEND FOR SEPTEMBER (30 DAYS): $2,214.43.

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $73.81.

___________________________________________________________________________

TOTAL SPEND FOR AUGUST (31 DAYS/PLUS VACAY IN HERE): $2,895.06. ⬆️

AUGUST AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $93.39.  ⬆️

Sunday Catch-up: Jackie Kennedy Speaks to Us

Hello from Sarabeth's in Chelsea Market, the bustling, Come-to-Jesus foodie mecca on Ninth Avenue between 15th and 16th streets. I was invited on a little tour by a marketing firm that represents Blackbarn, a restaurant and shop I WROTE ABOUT for the spring issue of ASPIRE DESIGN AND HOME Magazine.

I will blog in a separate post about the tour...but first, here is my update from yesterday.

 I rose at 6:20 a.m. to start cleaning my house! I'm in two book groups, one for well over 10 years [and they know my little, imperfect home, dust bunnies and all] and one for a year, called BCBC for Boot Camp Book Group or Book Camp.

I love my boot camp friends and miss them terribly. But Dan and I both cleaned a lot. These friends have fancy houses, I told him. We sprayed and wiped and swept and moved clutter.

Of course, my friends were gracious. I don't think they noticed the stain on the tan couch [Punchy spilled something?] and I hope they weren't offended by the tendency toward, um, keeping too much stuff.

When you host the group, you get to choose the book and I chose this one:

It came in a set, with a collection of CDs so you could hear Jackie's voice in lengthy interviews she agreed to soon after JFK was shot. The interviews were locked in a vault for 50 years and then, after much thought, her daughter, Caroline Kennedy, decided to release them.

We all talked a lot yesterday, and it was provocative. Her life, their marriage, the role of women at that time.

Since Jackie was polished and into French designers and speaking French, I made a tomato + cheese tart that looked French. I googled her favorite desserts and came up with Crème Brûlée and Strawberries Romanoff, a dessert she served to Princess Grace of Monaco. I made the latter, with help from my friend Sue, who rinsed and quartered two quarts of organic strawberries for me--since I was running behind--and from Dan, who ran out to get me a bottle of Grand Marnier to douse the berries before topping them with a nice rich cloud of real whipped cream with sour cream and confectioner's sugar folded in. Supersimple to make, but pretty and ladylike. I served them in my mother's stemmed wedding-crystal glasses.

It's 2:02 p.m. and I have a work email to write also, so let me do my money record:

SUNDAY $ SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• Whole Foods, 3 large organic tomatoes, fresh basil and wedge of fine cheese to grate for tart; 3 quarts organic strawberries; big wedge watermelon; 2 small loaves French bread; large container lemon-garlic olives; prepared green beans with crisp shallots; big bottle of good cold brew iced coffee that I put in large glass pitcher with lots of ice and half and half; organic orange juice [to have with Prosecco]; heavy cream; sour cream; plant-based half and half for Fig to try; jar Grey Poupon Dijon mustard for tart recipe; 2 bottles seltzer; 1 bottle Italian mineral water; 2 rolls recycled paper towels; 2 protein bars, $97.50.

TOTAL DAILY SPEND: $97.50.
RUNNING TOTAL FOR MONTH AS OF MAY 19: $1,633.81.
MAY AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $85.99.

Money thought: I wanted the best organic strawberries at the best price, so I went to Whole Foods. I was late, and it didn't feel good to be in a panic like that, but I didn't overspend in a crazy way.

I love this big, bright book. Bought it last week at Stamford Public Library while visiting Sis.
I think it was under $5. I found the rich dough recipe and the tart recipe in here.

Update, Hospital Food [Carb Loading] & Shopping

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• NYU Medical Center Cafeteria: crustless round quiche, $5.50; 2 small sausage links, $2.50; everything bagel, $1.75; smoked salmon [they gave me A LOT], $4.40; cream cheese, $1; tomato, 30 cents; and then back a second time for large coffee, $2.60 and bag of Financier Patisserie brand mini Coconut Rochers, small macaroons dipped in dark chocolate, $5.50. I saved half the bagel with lox--and of course half the bag of Coconut Rochers--for later. Total for two bills, $25.44. Please note, assuming this is the same size bag as the one on the patisserie website, the hospital gives a discount. On the website, $7.85. It's nice to know a hospital gives a discount on something. Though I have to say this place seems impeccable--in terms of service, staff, organization, branding [including purple color], cleanliness, comfort and more. Sis worked for NYU [prosthetics research] for more than 30 years.
• Amazon, as I sat in the waiting room. The Jackie Kennedy book for my next boot camp book club [book camp] meeting; Ruth Reichl's latest memoir about editing Gourmet Magazine [required reading for a magazine staffer and magazine lover like me]; monogrammed Lilly Pulitzer case for my iPhone 6 [my case is ragged]; and a Maida Heatter book that looked like a must. Total, $65.16. Here are the items. Check that phone case! 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
• Hospital gift shop. Beautiful low rose arrangement in small stoneware vessel for Sis; card; box of Li-Lac French Chocolates in lovely lavender floral box; a pair of Peepers reading glasses for me; and bag Australian black licorice, including steep NYC local sales tax of 8.875 percent [$9.01], $110.51. Flowers, card and chocolates for Sis from me, Dan, Fig, Punch and Sugar.

• Cafeteria, bottle of water, cup of ice, dark Toblerone bar, muffin, small bag chips, Illy coffee made from freshly ground beans, $13.40. 

TOTAL DAILY SPEND: $214.51.

MONTHLY SPEND AS OF MAY 9: $1,012.35.

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $112.48.

Money thoughts: Geez, I am tired and spending the night in hospital with Sis. We rose 5:15 a.m. and left 6:30 a.m with me driving from CT; got to NYU on First Avenue by 8 a.m. You can see that I bought a lot of carbohydrates, I think partly for fuel and partly an attempt to buffer stress. But the surgery went well, good outcome.

I also took my waiting-room opportunity to pay the $400 balance owed for Punchy's week of summer camp at the Wellfleet Bay Wildlife Sanctuary, but not listing that here. The week of day camp for $450 in my favorite place on earth would normally be $500 total but since we are Audubon members, $50 savings.

Digging into April

Busy with work assignments for two magazines....

Tricky to job hunt and meet writing deadlines, but balancing as best I can when I can....

Drove with my friend Rach to lovely Chatham, NJ to pick up her repaired car....couldn't resist checking out a highly rated coffee place/gluten-free bakery in nearby Short Hills. Squirrel & the Bee Grainless Bake Shop was a 10 min. drive from the garage.

As always, fun to explore another town or neighborhood.

Signing off early here, but not from my work.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• Starbucks app, grande iced Mango Dragonfruit Refreshers beverage for Punch, free with rewards earned on app.
• Joyist, nice organic latte with fabulously thick, spoonable foam on top, free. That's because in February, I signed up for the fundraiser to support women-owned businesses and paid $40 for a week of unlimited coffee. I'm entitled to as many cups as I can drink for 7 days, and have a cool card that says so.
• Squirrel & the Bee, book called Wheat Belly, by William Davis, MD--I want to read about this, since I often think I have a baker's white flour belly. The book also includes some great-looking recipes for GF baked goods that I look forward to trying. With tax, $14.96.
• Same place, breakfast sandwich for me and pack of delicious vegan, chocolate-covered Sweet Potato Bee Bites that Fig, Rach & I loved. Together, w $1 tip, $16.50.
• I don't think I'm going to include this in my monthly total....but maybe I should, since I did include Sugar's vet visits last month...Fig and Punch have Mochi, that tiny hand-me-down hamster they love, and he developed a lot of bald spots....the vet appt, counting meds and bloodwork, was $187.19. Vet thinks he has ringworm. Oh hell, I guess I will be scrupulous and include it. But we intend to collect some money from both girls for this astronomical fee for a baby fur puff. So when we do, will subtract from here. Ok, Fig quick-paid me $30 day later so I'm reducing our vet payment to $157.19 so far.
• Parking meters, Short Hills and Montclair, $3.25.
• Raymond's, classic club sandwich and large ice water plus $3 tip, $18.46.

DAILY TOTAL: $210.36.
MONTHLY SPEND AS OF APRIL 2:  $235.02.
AVERAGE DAILY SPEND SO FAR THIS MONTH: $117.51.