Working It in Red Shoes

Tory Burch Georgia Ballet Flats in Triple Red suede, on sale now for $129. I love the square toe, but admit they will look better on a demure foot than in my size 11. But still....

Pops of crimson footwear rocked two nights in a row this week at NYC events.

At a Work Like a Girl Q & A Tuesday on the Upper West Side (led by Erika Ayers Badan, kick-ass CEO and thinker, with trend forecaster Valerie Jacobs), a woman in the audience wore fresh red flats with dark neutral pants. The pants were the foil and the shoes were the pretty, energizing grounding. Like all flats, they looked good worn barefoot (or with low-cut, no-show Peds). Your pant hem should not drag or pool over the skimmers. Trim cropped or skinny pants work best. The shape of the shoe was feminine, the way it framed the foot, but not unprofessional. Fun. Work Like a (Very Smart) Girl and look good doing it, too.

For the on-stage discussion between Katie Couric and Bobbi Brown at the 92nd Street Y re the new book Still Bobbi, Katie chose strappy red slingbacks with a kitten heel. Bare legs, white button-down shirt, black and white delicately patterned midi-length skirt. The shoes were everything. Smooth-looking, shapely legs help. Made me think about how I need to moisturize more with a nice body butter. (Hello, looking at Homecourt's new body collection.)

And there was an audience question about red lipstick. Can everyone wear it?

"Absolutely not," Bobbi said. The color makes a strong statement and not everyone can or even wants to own that. It depends on your personality, she noted. On who you are.

"Does anyone in the audience have on red lipstick tonight?" she asked, to prove her point. One woman near the front waved her hand and pointed proudly to her mouth. But the auditorium was darkened.

Oh, and Bobbi had a clean, short mani in Poppy, her signature orange-red color. I've seen her wearing it on Instagram. I bought it in town at the Jones Road store and I love it, for pedis and manis. My home mani lasted for 5+ days without chips, and I do a lot of dishes and garden without gloves. The kit includes a two-in-one base and top coat.

I enjoy soaking up events like these not just for style and substance watching but also for being at the heartbeat of it all, New York, New York. 

The magical ruby slippers Judy Garland, age 16, wore in "The Wizard of Oz," 1939. Showing their age here, and drab and depressing compared to today's color-drenched footwear. 

Photo from The Smithsonian.

Vintage White Lace, Icing On a Cake

The Butterfield Skirt and matching cake,

PerennialSpring.com. Cake not available to order.

Designer Caily Herbert grew up down the block from us here in Montclair. Young Figgy received one of her girlhood dresses, a fancy hand-me-down, new with tags. Caily's been a baker, worked on a farm and in the book publishing world, involved with the (near) release of a very big book. She attended Bard College, in its magical perch overlooking the Hudson River.

But now, behold: Her dreamy, handmade clothing line fashioned from finite amounts of fabrics and trims that she found on her treasure hunts. Every garment is made-to-order.

From the PerennialSpring website: The Butterfield Skirt in eucalyptus green cotton, ever so slightly sheer. Order skirt with lining for ensured opacity. Garments pictured are unlined. Available in sizes XXS to 4X. (That's Caily modeling.)

I love this feminine circle skirt, made with vintage Schiffli lace trim that Caily says "looks like frosting on a cake." A long row of covered buttons at the side adds to the confectionery appeal. In one Instagram photo, Caily models the skirt while holding a blue frosted cake with careful swoops of white icing. "Correct accessory for the Butterfield Skirt," the caption says. If I get the skirt, it will be a splurge to wear as a feminine basic, with a black top and black capri leggings, since I am no longer twentysomething. A kitten heel would help, too. I love the color (my favorite), the cut, the swing, the buttons--and the cake lace. 👗👗🎂

This beautiful young woman can sew and bake...for her mom's milestone birthday party, she made a "Wedgwood" Cake modeled after the famous English china pattern dating to May 1759 and named for potter Josiah Wedgwood. Here's that iconic color scheme (BTW, the designer's mother, Kate, said both blue cakes tasted as good as they looked):

The 7-inch Magnolia Blossom vase from 2Modern.

Caily has a whole line of circle skating skirts with vintage ribbon trims. She styles them all with fun winter sweaters. You have to take a look.

Rejected, Ejected

Vintage black-tie image from Gentlemansgazette.com. Here is the link. 

It happened three nights ago, Wednesday, May 15 at a famous 14K gold hotel in New York City.

I will not wield a poison pen (or tap poison keystrokes) to write this, though I did feel hurt and vengeful in the moment.

I had received a media invite (an email, typical these days) to attend a black-tie charity dinner for a women's/family cause. I mulled it over. I don't have a black-tie wardrobe, or a shoe and handbag closet to pluck from.

The cause was important. I wasn't sure how I got on the invite chain, but I thought it might be related to a recent event I attended and wrote about. I RSVP'd yes.

I got my hair blown out. I asked Debbie to spray it hard so it would hold, especially on that damp day. I don't have an evening gown, but thought that would be okay, that the long list of media outlets I had seen on the invite would not all present in black-tie. I wore a pretty maxi dress, my very good vintage Kenneth Jay Lane earrings--the ones I'm wearing in my blog profile photo--and a cocktail ring, aquamarine set in gold prongs, from an antique shop on the coast of Maine. (I often wonder who owned it, and when. Did her husband present it? It makes a statement.) I booked a spot in a parking garage using SpotHero, and drove with my wipers on through congested traffic. I had a new Lilly Pulitzer notepad in my bag.

I was turned away.

Alice, go with her, the person in charge said loudly. "Her" was the young woman checking media names at the door. She had already combed and recombed the list and couldn't find me, then walked me over to see the woman in charge, who was standing among people in evening wear. Photos were being taken.

Did I mention that I had already met that person once, at a chic Soho shop event pre-Covid? As I recall, she held the reins pretty tight that time, too.

Was I an interloper, or a person who had been invited?

Next thing I knew, a man in black tie with eyeglasses appeared, and like a bad scene from "The Devil Wears Prada," he ushered me to the elevator, pushed the glowing button and waited to watch me descend, as though I would put up a fight or make a scene.

I have the media invite, I said, showing him my iPhone.

I'm sorry, we can't accommodate you. 

That's ridiculous. 

We sent out an email last night to let people know who made the list.

Well, I didn't get an email. And did you send one out to people who didn't make the list, too? That would be important. I drove all the way in from Montclair New Jersey.

I'm sorry we can't accommodate you.

That's too bad. It sounds like a good cause.

They all are.

This is outrageous. And as the doors closed, Please take me off your list.

Rejected. Ejected. Back to the coat check.

You're leaving? said the handsome black attendant. He and his co-worker, a white woman, had been the only two friendly people I'd met. Isn't it often that way? They had made me feel welcome.

Yeah.

He handed me my cardigan sweater and umbrella.

------------------------------------------------------

I thought, and maybe still do, they were not letting me in because of my dress, shoes, blowout (even with my hairspray helmet!), weight or age. They could see all that but they could not see my carefully acquired toolbox of words, the way my pen glides and flows, taking notes in my own shorthand, the details I drink in and capture, the colorful story I can tell and make come alive. They could not see my gift for connecting with people from many walks of life.

It wasn't until I checked on my cell phone later that I did indeed find an email, which had been sent out at about midnight the night before, saying I was not now on the list to attend.

So Tuxedo had not been lying about that.

So the email had gone out before they had seen me, before my dress and shoes had not been enough. Before I appeared with some frown lines, no Botox. Before they saw me but did not see my brain and heart.

---------------------------------------

It still felt bad. I had prepaid for parking (until 11 p.m.!), so I wandered around alone in my maxi dress with my Totes umbrella, up and down 57th Street. Past Bergdorf's, closed for the evening but its stylish windows (featuring a Marc Jacobs jeweled dress) always open. By the now shuttered restaurant, Mangia, that we editors used to love, past Carnegie Hall, where Dan took me to see Judy Collins when we were expecting Figgy. Then 224 West 57th Street, the old Hearst building, the gilded birdcage that housed Cosmopolitan. The Great American Health Bar, a holdout for carrot cake and soup, opened decades ago. An Italian restaurant. The Brooklyn Diner. 

As a I walked west, the tall towers ahead were half wrapped in mist. Gauzy skirts. 

It's still my city, I thought. Still the city I love, and no one can take that away from me.

I walked to Nordstrom, pot of gold at the end of my path, conveniently open til 9 p.m. with its convenient Prada Beauty alcove on the first floor that would take me in with open arms, not turn me away. I had read about Prada lipstick in WWD. (The gift guide drew me in with "We’re partial to the B105 shade for its modern take on the ’90s-inspired brown lipstick look.") 

I wanted to try it, but it's hard to choose a lip or cheek color online. Here was my chance to get a hands-on consultation. Ivan came through. He's right, the Prada Balm in the brand's signature mint green is cushiony and soft, addictive on its own or under the lipstick. (It does not go on green.) And he found a top color for me. Tonka. I love it. It brings out my eyes. And it's refillable so I don't have to add to the beauty landfill quite so much.

I then had a ridiculously overpriced yet somehow skimpy corned beef reuben on rye in a diner, for dinner, served with a tiny pleated paper cup of very good coleslaw and a rubbery pickle spear. No fries, but I didn't want the side salad on the plate. I stared down the cheesecakes and chocolate cakes taking star turns in a lit carousel by the entrance. I did succumb later to a crumb cake square from a deli. Then I headed back home, the lights of my glittery city in the rearview mirror.

At least, I thought, I turned a lost opportunity into a beauty win. And I do feel good about that. Now I just have to practice enough self-care to consistently build in time for makeup, because I look and feel better, younger and more confident when I wear it. The Tonka lipstick, yes.

P.S. When Dan heard what happened, he was upset. He told me I should call the people the next morning and complain. I know Dan, and I know he likes to stand up for me. I appreciate his loyalty. It touched me when I was fired from a magazine as a young writer. When the editor's name came up in conversation for a while, he would say Grrrrr, like a dog about to bite. But I can stand up for myself. For that reason, I won't tell him any details, like the name of the people or the charitable cause. 

P.P.S. Monday, 12:45 p.m. I just had my weekly telehealth therapy appointment with my wise therapist. It may have been brought to my attention by the end that: a. They had a strict limit on people; b. I hadn't checked my email to look for one from them before driving into the city; c. They have professional skills, but maybe kindness is not top of mind; and d. I internalized what happened and allowed myself to feel bad about it. Yes.

Mindful Sweaters from Brooklyn, Coffee Beans for a Cause

A  juicy orange 🍊 YETI cup, a soft, stylish sweater sustainably knit from recycled Italian yarn--everything with the bonus of giving bucks back to research into Parkinson’s, Alzheimer’s, autism, mental health. Happy Mother’s Day (and more) shopping.

https://www.brainandlife.org/articles/mothers-day-gifts-support-research-neurologic-disorders

🛍️ 

Fashion Fun: Meeting Hadley Pollet

Hadley Pollet and me. Note my new large navy makeup bag, 

which I had been eyeing on the website. It matches my denim dress.

In 2007, Dan and I did group training sessions to be foster parents, in our quest to add a second baby permanently to our family (hello, Punch in lavender fleece onesie, though a year later, your living situation would change and be on a long pause for years, years that affected hearts and souls). 

Our classes were taught by a mother-daughter pair, two pretty blondes from a nice pocket of New Jersey.

When I'm a student, I spend a lot of time studying my teacher's outfits. What else is there to look at in a state-mandated class? Back in high school, I studied my English teacher's nude pantyhose and ladylike heels, a male teacher's tweed blazers and gum-soled shoes. My college professors in Women's Studies varied, from scary well-known feminist (scary as in brisk and unfriendly, wearing business attire) to hippie from New York City, with long flowing hair and chunky, arty jewelry. 

The daughter in this mother-daughter pair of foster parenting teachers had a belt I loved. She was slim and wore it with her blue jeans. It had a tortoise tone buckle. I complimented her on it one week and then another. Finally, she said, "It's expensive, but you have to remember it's reversible, so it's like getting two belts for the price." I got a bee in my bonnet. I love feminine, and retro feminine, accessories. The floral patterns were just so pretty. Beautiful art as eye candy. I wanted one. The teacher told me they were made by a young woman named Hadley Pollet, and I started internet sleuthing.

I ordered a belt from the website (my waist was smaller then, but I hope to get back to that beauty, can't now close the size XL); a makeup bag with ribbon trim; a size XL top with rows of pretty ribbon forming fluted cuffs; a ribbon headband; a leopard print clutch; and fell in love in person with a large pink travel tote with brown ribbon trim at Thread, a Montclair boutique. That tote went on every road trip with me and even plane trips, until Sis got me a carry-on with wheels, far more practical at an airport than a heavy shoulder tote. I still love that tote. Then, on sale in 2018 with free shipping, the Pink Flutter Top (XL). Take a look. It's that gorgeous ribbon on the hem that I could not resist. I looked at it, looked away, looked back again.

I wore the Flutter Top with an open pink cardigan sweater over it in 

Palm Beach. (Link to photo here.)

But now that it’s getting hot, I will experiment a little. That ribbon against the black!!!

Thursday night, Sis and I met Hadley Pollet at an evening wine and hors d'oeuvres event in Greenwich, Connecticut, where the designer debuted her home line (pillows, table linens, lovely, especially the former). We enjoyed passed nibbles at The Country Table: Pea soup shooters with chile oil; fried chicken bites with housemade ranch dressing; prosciutto-wrapped asparagus; and stacked, squared "grown-up grilled cheese." Each waitress had a lemon half on the serving tray, for guests to put the toothpicks in after use. 

It was eye-opening, the pops of color, the flowers spilling over, the well-dressed, toned women and men, the lustrous gold leather on some purses, the always alluring belts, especially a pink plaid floral that reminded me of a 1950s picnic dress.

Hadley was warm and friendly and fun. Sis left with a peek-a-boo clutch she purchased and I bought a large navy makeup bag, so crisp and pretty. The company is women-run and supports causes for women and girls.

A note about how it all began, according to the Hadley website:

Hadley’s original signature belt designs sprung from inspiration while at Rhode Island School of Design. Her unique style caught the eyes of many when she wore a belt made of vintage ribbon and a tortoise buckle to a birthday party in Boston where several people asked where she got her belt. And with the blink of an eye, she started her business and never looked back. Since then, her line has expanded into a lifestyle brand for high-spirited, powerful women.

And here's a notice from the NY Times in 2002.

I'm happy Sis and I went! Good night.

The abundant flowers.

A former Hadley employee with a ribbon belt 

tied to the shoulder strap of her dress.

Sis surveying the event. She enjoyed it.

Good night to you.

Saturday Night Fashion Dash Down Madison Avenue

             Window shopping afforded a glimpse of cuddly blush mittens at Max Mara.

On Saturday night, Dan and I drove into NYC to see a short drone show over the treetops near Bethesda Fountain in Central Park--magical waves of birdlike flickers in pretty color patterns. (I hope the real migrating birds were not too disturbed. Birders were worried.) Free, totally free, but for the cost of a Lincoln Tunnel toll and a couple dollars to park by meter on Madison Avenue.

The park was packed--parents, children (“Hold onto Daddy’s hand, Tyler”), dogs, lovers, college kids, people with foreign accents, girl groups, a man with his motorcycle. It was fun, though I felt claustrophobic.

We then tried to get into Bemelmans Bar, a legendary spot in The Carlyle Hotel on Madison at 75th Street. What were we thinking? Drinks and bites at the bar. But we found a ticketed jazz show, and beautiful young women lined up to get in. A doorman in a hat. Upper East Side socialites. Without looking, I detected wafts of signature, expensive perfume in the air and heard youthful voices. Looking, I saw high heels; born-with, dewy skin; designer clothing. Dan in blue jeans, me wearing sneakers with my skirt? Um, no. Absolutely no. Sometimes we fit in, sometimes we don’t. Oh well. We are hopeful and daring. Anyway, we can dress up and make a dinner reservation one day.

We ended up getting drinks at The Mark nearby. And then we walked back to our car on 65th and Madison. I loved the window shopping under the moonlight. The stores were closed, it was near 10 p.m. 

Vera Wang. Max Mara. Christian Louboutin. (I couldn't get Dan to even stop and appreciate a peek at the shoes.) Valentino. Precious children’s clothing shops, with tiny smocked dresses. Grandmothers with deep purses must buy those to ship to L.A. Colors through the looking glasses, colors for adults: blush, embellished navy for evening wear and at V, classic black with white in an alluring take on the little black dress.

Valentino short Crepe Couture Black Dress with white shoulder bows. Made in Italy from virgin wool and silk, with concealed back zipper. In my dreams, if I were size 0 to 10, at least 30 years younger and had $5,500 in fashion lettuce and the life to match. (Size 0 already out of stock.) Let's see, that lettuce covers our mortgage, heating oil, electric, groceries, phones and cable, IRS payment plan, doctor and RX co-pays, health insurance, gasoline, car repairs, some money we owe Sis and.....

The style and shopping energy of Madison Avenue sets a very high bar, and I like that.

Good night.

3 Reasons I Love This Movie Star’s Fashion Edit

Gwyneth in the original G Label by goop Leah cashmere sweater. 

Now the core collection item comes in lemon drop yellow. 

(Alright, so maybe Gwyneth is a tiny size and doesn’t even need a bra 

because her breasts stand up without an underwire. As my editor used to say,“She would look good in a potato chip bag.” But she still sells the sweater for me.)

It’s a fact. Celebrities extend their brands, making extra millions with product lines. Remember Elizabeth Taylor’s perfume, the Fabletics fitness-wear line co-founded by Kate Hudson and Gloria Vanderbilt jeans?

Who doesn’t want a bottle of beauty worthy of a star or workout pants that flatten the belly and are endorsed by Goldie’s daughter?

But G Label from Goop....from Blythe’s daughter. I love Gwyneth Paltrow’s line and wish I could afford it full-on, but not in this lifetime, not at this moment. The one G Label black ribbed bodysuit I own, snagged on sale, is perfect, and I never want it to fall apart. It is cut so right, slimming, with a neckline to perfectly frame a face...and show off earrings and a necklace.

Take these 3 new "early-access” reasons-I-love pieces. The email just dropped today. 

1. Perfection in a black sweater. Lightweight cashmere to go around the seasons again and again, flattering sleeves, a stylish, feminine belt. Available in XL. $695. Figure I would wear it at least 100 times. That comes out to $6.95 per day to feel and look fashionable no matter what else is going on in my life.

2. Leather jacket lust. The bow at the neckline catches my eye, as does the soft leather (look how it drapes) and the two-way zipper. $1,395. What more can I say. Investment piece.

3. Lemon yellow ribbed cashmere with bracelet-length sleeves. (I don’t like this photo but can’t isolate the other views. Please click on link to truly see the sweater, not behind big coat and bag.) So maybe I don’t always look so great in turtlenecks, because my face is full, or the funnel might feel confining--or dark colors are more slimming, especially if you have a plump pouch. This Italian cashmere is so pretty, the color so lollipop lovely. I would have to work several hours to earn it, get paid on time by the client and then, also, not be able to cover some planned bills. Oops. $595.

Oh well. I think it’s this ability to fall in love with fashion, or recipes, or bedsheets and lamps, that made me so good at my job as a lifestyle writer at women’s magazines. If I’m in love, then it will be easier for me to convince you to fall in love, too, whether with a chocolate cake you have to bake (so moist, and that secret ingredient for a silky frosting, go buy the French cocoa) or a belted cardigan. 

Happy weekend. For now, I guess I’m shopping my closet.

As Seen in Montclair

Pre-owned, vintage white gold and mother-of-pearl Alhambra necklace from Van Cleef & Arpels, sold on Farfetch.com now for $3,290.

This is Montclair. Hence, I’ve seen some well-heeled style in the 31 years since Dan and I first moved into an old Bellevue Avenue apartment here with plaster walls, golden sconces, a butler’s pantry and black-and-white tile bathroom after our honeymoon.

The township is not homogeneous, no whole-milk Madison Avenue. Montclair prides itself on being inclusive. We have Grey Poupon mansions with groundskeepers and crowded apartments, polished parks with ponds and grassy patches worn down by teens with nowhere else to go. We don’t have just white skin, but all rich colors and all gender identities. 

It’s the style watch I’ve kept as we moved along, saving money to drive our possessions across town from apartment to small house, living as writers, putting our girls through the public schools. It’s this home base where I take in fashion, where I first saw a man wearing a pink oxford shirt with jeans and good brown leather shoes without socks. (I saw him often, and came to believe he had a trust fund.) 

Sure, I’ve peeked into the Van Cleef & Arpels shop, a hushed church of jewelry ensconced in Bergdorf Goodman on Fifth Avenue, musing about how it would be to have an income (mine or someone else’s) to cover a piece of that. But here in Montclair, I have seen the jewelry up close, resting just so against the tanned collarbones of beautiful women. 

On Friday, after my doctor’s appointment, I stopped at Van Hook, where the well-cheesed fill their baskets with select wedges, Norwegian crackers, ceramic Brie bakers, and pints of heavy cream from a farm. Then I walked around the corner to Jones Road, Bobbi Brown’s flagship makeup store. (Did I tell you I once saw Bobbi in the Kings produce aisle?) Due to Covid, the shop limits customers to six at a time. 

I waited 15 minutes in the sun and got to know the women in front of and behind me. Both were warm and friendly. We all had kids in school, and were happy to have a small pocket of time to beauty shop. We chatted as only fans can when bonding to get our hands on Bobbi’s cult line.

Ahead of me, the pretty, slim-hipped blonde wore penny loafers (penny loafers!), with her jeans, perfect for back-to-school week. She said the shiny copper pennies are remembrances of her two high school children--a penny in each shoe, with the appropriate birth year. She wore Van Cleef & Arpels necklace and earrings from the venerable Paris jeweler. I had a chance to study the iconic Alhambra charms and start to grow a love for those flowers, between drinking paper cups of lemon water from the mason jar outside Jones Road.

Behind me was a mother of three kids who, like me, said she often ran around with no makeup on and wanted to change that, maybe with Bobbi’s Miracle Balm, which comes in different glowy shades. 

Both shoppers were from nearby towns, not Montclair. But here is where I’ve plumped up my style file. This is where I first saw:

*Hermès jewelry, favored by fashionable Holly, owner of a clothing shop on Valley Road.

*Tory Burch flats, in the former Tory Janes store, which I still miss.

*Luxury linens and Santa Maria Novella shampoo from Florence. The shopowner brought it back in her suitcase. It was expensive even back in the nineties but I swear I had a great hair day whenever I used it. 

*Even elite boutique chocolate, from Mariebelle bars in Susan's dark-chocolate shop with a narrow winding staircase to Basque Cheesecake (made by Julia at Vesta Chocolate) with whipped ganache and caramel.

Style is beauty, comfort, art. Earrings that catch  the light when they swing. Fun coats that make a dark winter day better.  Cakes that stir up conversations. Mothers who share everyday fashion talk on a line outside a shop.

I do love Montclair, whether or not, at the moment, my heels are worn low and I need a new pair.

Final Season of “Younger” Does Not Disappoint

Above: Liza Miller (Sutton Foster) and Kelsey Peters (Hilary Duff) on “Younger” this season. Image from THE CINEMAHOLIC.COM.

I love this show (based on a novel by a long-time Montclair writer, redheaded Pamela R. S., who recently moved to the West Coast).

The premise: A divorced mother from the suburbs who is about 40 pretends to be 26 so she can re-enter the workforce in NYC...with a job in the publishing world. Everything about it is delicious, from the characters to the clothing. Hilary Duff, as Liza’s fellow editor, is excellent.

Sad that this (seventh) season is the last.... we haven’t seen Liza, Charles, Josh and crew since 2019. I’ve missed them. The pandemic put a lot of joys on hold.

The first four episodes were released to watch free--if you have Hulu or Paramount. Free, okay, but a ton of short commercial breaks, for everything from Chambord Raspberry Liqueur (to mix with Prosecco for a cocktail) to vaccine promotions, Google ads and repeated plugs for Stanley Steemer home cleaning service.

Here’s what I loved:

• Hilary Duff’s look! She is quite short next to tall Liza (Sutton Foster) but the styling! Long white overcoats, heels, a creamy sweater with cutout neckline, long skirts, short dresses, rich blouses, great lipstick, pretty ponytails. It’s a big part of the show, the style watching. I’m not sure when this season was filmed, but maybe Duff, 33 in real life, is in so many great coats to hide her pregnancy?--she just delivered her third child in March.
• Ditto on dressing the star of the show (Foster). Kelly green sweater, long hemlines, black wetsuit for surfing scenes in Montauk. (We do not see her actually surf.)
• The leading men. Very handsome, very good sideways and subtle glances. Charles has impeccably cut suits and shirts--and hair.
• The scriptwriting. Fast-paced, witty, trendy NYC.
• Best city in the world. Rooftop parties, the Rainbow Room, Williamsburg, press/book launches, coffee with oat milk--not to mention the aerial view of Montauk and the lighthouse there.

Since Dan has written several books, I do find some of the inner workings of the book publishing world to be a bit unreal/inaccurate. Dan is not a celebrity author, but he has gotten some nice $$ advances/contracts. He works very hard crafting/researching detailed pitches and his very good/high-profile agent shops them around to multiple publishers. But on the show, the authors come in and pitch their books to the team....it’s very entertaining, just don’t know if it is real.

Moreover, I guess we really don’t know if the world will be back in offices full-time again...so that is another question. No one working remotely.

We had some choppy waters again today (Dan has a tick bite but got to doctor, Sis had to take Buttercup to vet for a reason, Skippy was here briefly with Mimi and we had bumps), but catching this on my laptop was pure fun. Watched all four already. Escapism at its best.

Good night.

The Doris Day Show

The next step on my baby-food, old TV show kick: “The Doris Day Show.” It aired on CBS from 1968 to 1973. Photo link from here. I have to say there’s something about this photo that bugs me, because Doris had such a wholesome image. But I went with it because it shows the hair bow, color-coordinated outfit, etc.

I have a very clear memory of being with my mother as a girl and listening to Doris Day sing “Que Será, Será” on the kitchen radio. Dan remembers the song from his childhood, too.

I don’t recall seeing Doris Day movies until I was on my own/married (“Pillow Talk”)  but I must have seen one, or read a story about her in a magazine--because I immediately spotted a Doris doppelgänger in the college dining hall in freshman year.

I think the young woman was a friend of Jackie, my friend from my hometown--her name was Maura, or Moira, I believe.

She had blonde hair and a pretty headband that matched her outfit--all fresh-squeezed colors--and I think her skin was tan. I think she wore lipstick, and nail polish, to accentuate the outfit.

You remind me of Doris Day, I said. 

And I think/hope I smiled and added And I mean that as a compliment, because I did.

I was fascinated by the young woman’s panache--right down to the shoes--and the confidence to carry it off. Most of us wore jeans, sweaters and if we were up to it, lip gloss. (Though another friend, Megan, also wore headbands and had cute sweaters, preppy turtlenecks and penny loafers.)

I just happened upon this show and started watching a week or two ago......I LOVE seeing the outfits Doris wears, the hairdos, the hats, the hair bows, the colors, oh the colors! Lavender, orange, perfect mauve, blue plaid, lemon yellow, black. Pretty pink or coral pink lipstick, frosted blue eye shadow, a fringe of dark lashes. Tunics, cardigans, ponchos, pantsuits. Statement necklaces, chunky rings. She is so pretty. And a big part of this is that we didn’t have color TV in this time period, so it’s a treat to look back and see it now, a slice of the time when I was a girl. I don’t think I knew women in 1968 to 1973 (when I was 7 to 12) who dressed this fashionably.

See what I mean? A scarf, a ponytail. I’m drawn to that hairstyle but usually can’t pull it off unless I get my curly hair dried smooth at the salon. Image from here.

As a long-time writer on staff in the magazine world, I love that she works at Today’s World, a (made-up) family magazine based in San Francisco. I’ve been thinking of friends Kim and Liz, who also lived in San Francisco, and of my niece, Anna, a talented, Maine-born artist who has an apartment  there.

The TV story line starts with Doris, whose husband died, leaving NY and moving back in with her Dad at a ranch north of San Francisco. She has two young sons to raise. 

Above: Wholesome image from here.

But by season five, the family/mom/sons part is written out of the script and Doris is dating handsome men and living in her own swinging apartment with spiral staircase.

It’s just such a time capsule--women’s roles at work, fascinating. Men’s style, too--the turtlenecks, the hair. 

Image above from here.

I watch these old shows on Amazon Prime on the living room TV.  Dan is skeptical at first, and then he watches a little bit, too, in spite of himself.

Good night.

TCOY

1. Went in person to Palm Sunday Mass. Quiet prayer. And my friend Jean Rose was there--we talked after. 
2. Talked to Figgy. Broached some tough topics.
3. Dan and I had long phone call with Mimi and Poppy to lay out some Skippy groundwork/ground rules.
4. Planted pink tulips in my indoor pot.
5. Fresh berries and fresh figs.
6. Talked to Sis and to my friend Candy.
7. Lit a white taper candle--comfort on the mantel.

My Gift to Myself: May the Future Be Rosy

Tomorrow is my big birthday and I got this for myself from Draper James--Reese Witherspoon’s style site. I’ve eyed a lot of things there, but this is my first order.

I love pink sweatshirts, but the truth is, they don’t always love me back, not with a big belly. 

I’ve been losing weight, and this pattern was so sweet and irresistible and also, there are masks to match, but I didn’t get those. Reese, tho petite, also offers big sizes!

Here is link to the Natalie sweatshirt.

I feel much younger than my age.....and BTW, this is the first time I paid with Afterpay, which many websites offer. It is interest-free; you pay one-fourth of your balance (I used my debit card) upon ordering and the next three payments are spread out.

An ode to sweatshirts I’ve loved:

• Lavender hand-me-down? from Sis in Dumont. I was in high school, and wanted to be a professional writer. I wore it to write sometimes, emulating Oscar Madison, the sweatshirt-wearing sportswriter character on “The Odd Couple” TV show. I wore it until it was holy around the neckline.
• White with pink and gray flowers when I lived in my own apartment by the sea. I don’t remember where I bought it (probably at a mall), and IDK what happened to it. For all I know, it’s up in our attic somewhere.
• Strawberry-ice-cream-pink with white coffee logo from the Hot Chocolate Sparrow on Cape Cod. Punch traded it for Converse sneakers from her friend Kiki, who moved to Montclair from the U.K. a few years ago. I had let Punch wear it (see belly reference, above) but--then it vanished. I didn’t have the heart to ask for it back.
• Strawberry-ice-cream-pink with small North Eastham (Cape Cod) logo. I bought it at the tiny Welcome Center you pass when driving Route 6 East toward Ptown. I again didn’t like how the crew neck looked on me, and mostly, Punchy wears it, rotating it with a navy blue one; a B & W Nike logo one Mimi got her; and one the color of Nantucket Reds. I knew she would like to share the soft pink one to keep warm on breezy Cape Cod evenings.

It’s been a busy day. Good night, sweet dreams.

TCOY

1. Watched the Inauguration, with a capital I. It was everything and more. Amanda Gorman poem and her beauty, poise and delivery! Just everything....everything....new hope. I generally don’t like that P is remote schooling because it is such a struggle for her, but I did today, when we could all watch this together on TV in the living room.
2. Played board game with Figgy, Punch and Miss Desi, who was here for weekly appointment.
3. Made roast chicken ratatouille.

Don’t Wear a Cashmere Sweater to Clean the Toilet

Above, Donna Reed does housework. I found the image on this intriguing blog: http://mid-centurypink.blogspot.com/p/mid-century-housewife-project.html. Mid-century housewife project!

My Medium post below:

https://alicegarbarinihurley.medium.com/dont-wear-a-cashmere-sweater-to-clean-the-toilet-f738da492275

Good night, sleep well.

Sorry Not Sorry, Santa--No Cookies for You

1. A picture of me in a dress by Karina Dresses that I came across maybe seven? years ago in Thread, a boutique that used to be right next to Bluestone Coffee Co. on Watchung Avenue in Montclair. That's Punch/Skippy sitting nearby. Then, over Labor Day Weekend 2019, Dan, Punch and I tried to go away overnight at the last minute with our friends A and M and their daughter, but the Airbnb fell through and we ended up walking around Kingston, NY, where my friend A saw the Karina Dress shop, with its motto: "The original easy dress."  However, the shop was closed. I looked it up online later.
2. A link to my latest Medium story, which includes a reference to Karina Dresses and a new teal velvet one.

https://alicegarbarinihurley.medium.com/sorry-santa-no-cookies-for-you-9330a4a10b31

My Latest Magazine Stories: French Chic, a Farmhouse---and Upcycling Timeworn Men's Shirts

A SHIRT STORY 👕👕🧵

NEW LOOK FOR OLD FARMHOUSE KITCHEN 🥚🥚🐐🐐

ANCIENT MARINER'S HOME NOW A BORDEAUX APARTMENT 🚢 🌊

PARISIAN SHOP WITH BLUE DOORS 🦓 🦓

Such Luxury of Time

I'm so happy my friend Anne and I took this girls' trip. I qualify this Anne as my friend because, well, IDK, but my Mom spelled her name Anne and Figgy's real name is Anne.

We spent about $125 each per night ($245 each, total), counting taxes and fees, for this Airbnb stay at the Rugosa Guest House in Eastham. I would highly recommend this place. In season, of course, the rates for this spacious suite would be higher. It includes two bedrooms, two bathrooms, a deep tub with water jets and a small deck with table and chairs. 

In early October, I received a press email from Gayle Conran of ConranPR regarding the "Annual Monumental Yard Sale" in Provincetown this weekend. Anne loves yard sales. I knew she would literally drive to the end of the earth to get to this one, and I was right. Ptown is where the land meets the sea.

Fun today:

• A morning shower with my Twilly d'Hermes Body Shower Cream.
• Coming across Sarah Kain Dresses on Commercial Street in Ptown! The designer upcycles fabrics...I bought a beautiful scarf (red velvet one side, mauve fabric the other, with fringe trim) and a dress she sewed from vintage denim.
• Good coffee.
• Pretty views.
• Nap.
• Walk along beach in Provincetown.
• Exploring the Jewelry Studio of Wellfleet. where two sisters polish their craft. Gorgeous silver and gold, sea glass, turquoise, miniature Wellfleet oyster charms. Browsing, just browsing.
• Checking out every T-shirt on God's green earth so Anne could get some for her husband and kids (and one for herself, which she loves, a Mac's Seafood one with a mask on the fish.) I didn't mind a bit. No rush, pure fun. Where Anne seeks out bargains and stylish tees, I seek out velvet scarves and vintage dresses.
• Chose cute gift for Figgy! at Utilities, a kitchen/home shop I will definitely revisit!!!!!!!!
• Steamed Chinese food for dinner. Lots of vegs.
• Continued chatfest with Anne.
• Lovely audio text from Punchy! Lovely calls and texts from Dan, Figgy, Sis. Even when we stray from home, it's nice to be grounded.

Good night. We head home tomorrow at noon. But Wellfleet Bay Wildlife Sanctuary before that, and last stop at Hot Chocolate Sparrow!!!

Sweater Set: Sat/Sun/Mon $pend

I didn't spend a cent yesterday [we ate staples, like eggs, cheese and spaghetti, plus some fruit--and good mushroom-zucchini soup from Joyist] and hope to keep it lean today. If I do spend money, I will update the record here.

Saturday was another story.

I entered Susanne N., an upscale boutique on Bellevue Avenue. I like that they carry Wolford tights [made in Austria], just like my beloved Bergdorf's and Nordstrom in NYC do. But right in my town!

I had seen the SALE sign in the window but resisted.

I saw this Chelsea cashmere sweater from Diane Snyder. I was not familiar with that brand, but I fell in love with this pop of fresh turquoise, the ribbed cuffs, the buttons on the side. The price tag was $448, as noted below. It was on sale for $179, which I know is still a lot. But I have to be honest. When I am worn down trying to do my best to mother Punch, and feel like I am shouting into the wind, I reach out to soothe myself. I feel like I deserve it.

I also found a beautiful off-white and black Leo & Ugo cardigan with black lace detail and jewel buttons. It was $335, on sale for $100.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET, SAT/SUN/MON:

• Deli, large sandwich to last 2 days and container of sautéed green peppers, plus tip, $15.50.
• Susanne N., two designer sweaters, $279.
• Joyist, brought Fig avocado toast and a Jackie turmeric latte at work, $16.
• Whole Foods in Connecticut with Sis, organic whole milk, macadamia milk, coffee, Vermont butter, large grass-fed plain yogurt, blackberries, cracker flats, marinara sauce, spaghetti x2, and for Sis, maple syrup and oat milk, $54.08.

total spend: $364.58.
ongoing monthly spend as of Feb. 17: $1,563.88.
avg daily spend: $91.99.

Anniversary Flowers

Check this LINK to see the lushest, most luscious-looking flowers ever, designed by Amy at Studio Nectar.
I have seen them around town for more than a year, wishing for some because they are so exquisite, and they were on display this week alone at Vesta Chocolate and Joyist. Amy is even collaborating, I think, with Vesta.
She advertised her Valentine’s bouquets and I ordered one. I think it comes in a stemmed, retro-looking vase with a vintage ribbon tied around it.
Since Monday is our 29th wedding anniversary and tomorrow is Val Day, I ordered flowers for us. Can’t wait.
TCOY

1. 8 AM yoga class.
2. Made veggie burger on rye for lunch.
3. Spinach salad with dinner.
4. Bought another 15-class yoga card on sale. [Not listing here in $, figure it’s important for my body and mind.]
5. Short nap on couch under pink wool jblanket, when Dan went to get Punch at ice rink.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET
In addition to putting my earnings from writing to paying $440 for heating oil and $300 child care today:

• 29th anniversary flowers in vase, delivered tomorrow, $110. Dream bouquet.
• ShopRite groceries, $107.87.
• Layla black ribbed knit turtleneck, free shipping, about $30. Sale. This was with my email signup 20 percent discount.

Will crunch numbers tomorrow. Good night.

Good Night, Little Women--Including the Feisty One Under Our Roof

Emma Watson as Meg March in pink dress.

Dan, Sis, Figgy, Punch and I went to see "Little Women" at 7:10 tonight, sitting in cushy, heated, reclining seats.

Sadly, though Dan bought five tickets in a row, Punchy, 12, didn't sit with us. She sat in the row behind us. This is not the first time she has done this, though I had high hopes since she sat right between Dan and me at this same cushy theater when we saw "Knives Out" last month.

This is called having conflicts "bonding." I kept turning around to be sure she was still there, and still safe, not somehow kidnapped. Swiveling my head from Marmee to Punch, Jo to Punch.....Concord to Punch, Paris to Punch. Gentle coaxing did not work. So after trying a couple times at first, I stopped.

I loved the movie. I regret to say I have never read the book--though I learned now that Sis did. I think she took it out of the Dixon Homestead Library in Dumont.

I am going to get my hands on it soon. Yay.

When Dan and I drove across America in the summer of 1990, we took two weeks to get to L.A. I then had to fly back and get to my job at Good Housekeeping. As a freelancer, he took another two weeks for the return drive. He stopped in Concord, where Louisa May Alcott and famous male writers had lived. He was writing 60-Second Novels all across, and for, America.

Concord is now on my bucket list. I am going to see this author's house.

And when Jo takes Beth to the sea, I think that was beautiful Chatham Bars Beach, on Cape Cod. I'm about to Google that now. Dan thought it looked like Chatham, too. I'm back and I'm wrong. It was Crane Beach in Ipswich, a coastal Massachusetts town--not on my beloved Cape.

It's late, 11:24 pm, so I think I will list what I loved:

• The candy-colored fabrics and rich textiles. The beautiful lace curtains, as lovely as bridal lace [I want those and I know a source in Cape May]. The slippers Beth embroiders, the full skirts, the brocade, the men's wool trousers, the long jackets Marmee wore with cord belts. The beading, the ticking, the nubby wools and colorful socks. The hats. The velvets. The men's white poet shirts. The costumes in the attic.
• The fanciful feasts. The Christmas breakfast, and the touching scene in which Marmee and her daughters pack it all up in baskets for the family in need down the road. The replacement feast from the wealthy neighbor. Those colors, textures.....so lush. I also like the scene in which cloves are inserted into tangerines [or clementines].
• The pure outdoors. The pond for skating....the snow to trudge through.....the wooden bridge Jo leans on when she tears up a letter....the fences. The bouquets of flowers Beth and Amy tie to the fence on Meg's wedding day. The letter box nailed to the tree in the woods.
• The sisters. They love, compete, encourage, play. They share and laugh and steal. And they have aspirations.
• The exploration of women's roles and choices then. Well, this is everything.
• The writing and book printing process! And the editor! And Jo's negotiating with him, meeting his gaze, calm and steady. His insights about what sells books. And his daughters' insights about what sells books, too. Also, above all: Jo dipping her pen in the inkwell, writing by candlelight.....
• The directing [go, Greta] and the acting.....especially captivated by Laura Dern as Marmee, Emma Watson as Meg, Saoirse Ronan as Jo [loved her in "Brooklyn," too], Florence Pugh as Amy, Timothée Chalamet as Laurie and Meryl Streep as mean Aunt March.

I hope the little woman snug asleep upstairs will sit with us at the next movie.

Good night.

TCOY

1. Mass. Church was still decorated with trees, manger, wreaths.
2. Nap.
3. Clementine.
4. Made good coffee.
5. Healthy Sunday dinner with Sis--salmon, broccoli, baked potatoes.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• Bagel shop after church with Punch and friends, with tip, $7.
• Vineyard Vines, had my eye on this Velvet Plaid Blackwatch top in person all season; now it was on sale. With shipping, $55.85.

LINK.

Total daily spend: $63.85.
Running monthly spend as of Jan. 5: $678.08.
Avg daily spend: $135.62.

Cyber Shopping Frenzy

In the holiday spirit: Punchy when she was a baby elf, living with her birth mom
but at our house for a visit.
When she was a little older, she would call on the phone, asking, "Alice and Dan,
I wonder when you are available to pick me up?"

How many emails and texts and paid Instagram posts did YOU see, luring you to shop on Cyber Monday and then give back today, for Giving Tuesday? It was a frenzy, everywhere I turned.

I was working at home, waiting for a phone call. Meanwhile, I browsed my in box. At 10:01 am, an email with the header Giving Tuesday! Treat Yourself and Give Back Today! arrived from Karina Dresses, based in Kingston, NY. Made in the USA, easy to pack, machine washable, stylish, fit for all sizes, from very small to very large. I have one that I bought at a boutique in town years ago and I love it. For the size guide, you can choose your body shape [top heavy, bottom heavy, etc. etc.] and the company recommends styles.

The email said:

Giving Tuesday Has Arrived!

Shop with us today and not only will you receive 30% off your purchase, but we will be donating 10% of all our sales to the A.S.P.C.A. We love our pets here at Karina Dresses and we know you do too! Treat yourself and help us give back! Use the code DRESSES4ALL at checkout.

I needed to get some work clothes, anyway. I have been rotating one black skirt, one coppery-colored faux-wrap dress, one striped skirt and one black dress [which is delicate wool, from a thrift shop, and almost ready to fall apart]. Today I chose two beautiful dresses for a total of $151.80 instead of $108 each. And I liked that 10 percent of all purchases went to the A.S.P.C.A. That's generous.

I did a lot today between work and home and returning rental car for Maine, and want to go to bed! Good night. Sweet dreams.

TCOY

1. Ate some fresh green beans.
2. Ice water.
3. Bought Woolite [expensive] and washed work clothes [not the wool dress!] on delicate cycle.

$ MONEY SPENT OUT OF POCKET

• Refilled rental car tank to half, as we received it, $18 plus tip, since snowy and icy, $19.
• Uber back to Montclair from car rental place in Paterson, with $3 tip, $15.29.
• Kings, a real honey comb for Punch, who was with me; half-gallon organic grass milk; large bottle Woolite; 2-pack Viva paper towels; focaccia; healthy chicken sausage breakfast patties; tea light candles; box of pasta; and annual December splurge, Lake Champlain Chocolates [Vermont made] red and green milk and dark foil-wrapped coins to put in our crystal jar, $83.16.
• Two Karina dresses, free shipping, $151.20. [Giving Tuesday sale, 30 percent off plus 10 percent went to A.S.P.C.A.]
• Gas for our humble blue car, $15.

TOTAL DAILY SPEND: $283.65.

ongoing spend for month as of December 3: $510.38.

average daily spend: $170.13.
I have to bring this down, but I also have to buy a lot of gifts this season.

______________________________________________________

COMPARE TO 4 PRIOR MONTHS:

Total spend for November (30 days): $2,979.03. ⬆️

Average daily spend: $99.30. ⬆️

__________________________________________________________________

TOTAL SPEND FOR OCTOBER (31 DAYS): $2,495.36.🍎 ⬆️

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $80.49.🍎 ⬆️

_____________________________________________________________________

TOTAL SPEND FOR SEPTEMBER (30 DAYS): $2,214.43.🍎⬇️

AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $73.81.🍎⬇️

___________________________________________________________________________

TOTAL SPEND FOR AUGUST (31 DAYS): $2,895.06. ⬆️

AUGUST AVERAGE DAILY SPEND: $93.39.  ⬆️